Nestled in cedar lies a cache
of residual thoughts waylaid
by murky memories of paper dolls,
wilted roses and coriander.
Where sentient benches gossip of pigeons
seeking refuge amongst stale crumbs of lithium
mindlessly regurgitating coos of splendor
in their drug induced paradise.
I, Sired once by fire,
lavished in the inferno
of an earlier era,
now extinguished to wisps of smoke
which cling to tattered bones
and a broken mind, trapped
in a paradox appropriately named
recollection.
Desperately dredging the intangible contour
for answers imbedded deep
in the flesh of crudely chiseled marble;
answers--chained in stasis--
forbidden from emancipation by the psyche.
Memoirs in black on pulp of ash
produce storm clouds which precipitate clues
of a more than mundane existence.
An existence that plays
the childhood game of hide-and-seek,
more often hiding than seeking
thieving those memories,
of a wonderful past once known;
I knew her name, yet her face is charred.
She was the epitome of love and desire
forever lost to crude grey matter.
Unable to conjure fleeting images
of a more than remarkable past
for the pages front and back
that now exist are hollow
vacant of word, letter, color or image...
A rich history
which now lies dormant
in those murky memories
of this recurring song,
a vinyl disc that skips endlessly
which can vaguely be described
as a past life no longer mine;
residing in a chest of cedar.
What did you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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Eternally applausable...
This is by all direction and connection a top collector's literary jewel. I have enjoyed the reading of masterpiece. "Cedar Chest" glows.
In respect and admiration,
Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU
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Rich words, tender feelings are yours
Also, seemingly, a "rich history....on recurring songs" residing in your memory chest! The bunch of lines in the poem as a brilliant "existence plays" a good role to evoke hope in the readers' heart!
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I'm not sure if this is talking about dementia; if it is, I think the idea is really neat!
I do think I'd make it a bit shorter. In particular, I was looking at the lines about the crudely-chiseled ancestral busts wrought of marble. Usually, I'd just shorten 'wrought of marble' to 'marble busts,' but that would give you too many adjectives all in a row, all with a similar-sounding ending. -
Good Write
I enjoyed the imagery and the emotion. Well written,
Bravo,
Crimson Poet
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thumbs up
nice poem. you're a well spoken writer.
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Beautifully said...clicked this by mistake but I'll would have felt guilty if I didn't bother to leave a comment
anyways this poem has all the criteria of excellence... I love
the imagery you presented
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Lovely, evocative
Lovely, original imagery, richly evocative of memories coming alive. This seems to describe a separate, magical world. Wonderful lyrical style.
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Good diction.
Is there a reason you capitalize the first word of every line? The line "I, sired once by fire" in the third stanza really sticks out from the rest of the poem, which is intriguing. I was expecting some sort of hint by the end of the poem to gain clarity on that, but it still leaves me somewhat confused. I think it would be nice to omit any use of "I" considering you are describing someone who has no sense of themself, at least in their past life.
The second stanza is my favorite. Overall, I enjoyed this poem. -
Ok. A bit long, but wonderful imagery. Thanks for writing it. I think the length was the bad part. Other than that, BOY do I wish I could relate, but I can't so I have to complament you and your ability. If I were to change it, I'd revise the lengh and maybe try to smush some stanza's into others.
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Brilliant images, a very profound write and my favourite part is the reference you made about the childhood game of hide and seek. This whole write is so original and different, jsut loved it. Powerful till the end. Thanks for sharing.
Love and light,
Lencio -
I get emotional when I read great poems
Mindlessly regurgitating coos of splendor
In their drug induced paradise.
drug induced people are dumb, I hope they realize it and induce non-druged paradise. ...becuase the drugged will not be paradised. ...nah. lol!
too much has been replaced and
I cant go anywhere
whoa, those were devine! -
This is amazing. It has great imagery and you portrayed the emotion really well.
"Memoirs in black on pulp of grey
Accentuated by photographs of sepia
Producing storm clouds which precipitate clues
Of a more than mundane existence."
I love that part.
I think you should for sure enter this in the contest you were considering entering.
Great write.
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some great images here. "forever lost to that cedar prison" and "of this recurring song, a record that skips endlessly" both in particular really work for me.
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whoa, you look like you were beheaded. wear's you're body?
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that is too funny, I've been laughing ever since I saw your commnet pop up. maybe that is why I like this picture
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