Square inch of sun by leander at All poetry

A break in the clouds

made me realize
I have lived

     too many winters.

I am the lion,
     bitterness the cage
     bearing down on me -
     but the bars
         are tardily bending
         as they alliterate
             with your name.

Just a humble,
almost non-existent sunrise
I hopefully won't screw up

(since I'm quite talented to)

but it's something.

Author notes

Probably very high hopes...

A contest entry

Best Prewrites From July 2009 by amaranthine lover. 1075 points, ended September 6, 17 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest

Please tell me what you think

Comments

1 - 14 of 14

By me, right now

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amaranthine lover
September 6
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22.05 / 25
I very much like this one.
Scion
August 5

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This is a poem (excuse me THE poem) that everyone understands and has experienced the emotions described therein so vividly, but could not put into words. You just did it. And it's pretty much THE poem.
I do find the imagery of the lion (not the most easily tamed of God's creatures) in the cage (of bitterness) to be the best in this poem. I feel your words sort of transcend the "I'm writing a poem" experience. Anyone and everyone can feel the words, be moved by them, love them, hate them, be enthralled by them. That last one was me... I'm enthralled.
tara wilson
August 2

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i remember a poem by you i read a long time ago, about the scratches your cat left on the door.... just wanted you to know that i remember it. your poetry is powerful and has a lasting effect within the reader. this one leaves such a wonderful feeling of things looking up.
amaranthine lover
July 28
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Please tell me dear friend, how do you come to terms with something that is quite different from anyone else I ever come across?
Daniela Violin
July 24

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I don't see much of the sun out here in Canada these days. I feel you on this. But if we don't drown in sadness we can keep the sun up in our lives... Hope the sun rises for you soon, this is beautiful expression, Leander. truly beautiful. I should read your work more often as I am always impressed.
Viyanna Rosemarie
July 24
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your,a winner!
your poem,places you in the great heartfelts of mankind .great job!
ToBSavvy
July 24

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always keep your hopes high and allow the sun to trise in your heart.
never see your hopes drown in deep waters of discontent.
your poem speaks to the heart and hopefully helps others who need to be lifted.
even the sun is humble within the warmth of loving arms.
very beautiful.

i accidently clicked here but because i believe there are no coincidences in life, this was as it should be. thank you for the message and the hope. you will do good because you are "talented to". [ILT]
Poesing
July 24
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By the looks of your picture, seems like you have the sun-a-risin' in your arms.
Peteskid
July 24
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wonderful strong words here, the sunrise in all of us too, the things we wish are in front of us, always...urging us to take another step...PK
JinSays
July 24
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Just a humble,
almost non-existent sunrise
sunrises are never humble.
lovely poem.
Jin
LadyUnique
July 24
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this made me smile
Nicolette
July 24
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beautiful, and yes you are talented in all the right ways....

~ Nicolette
ladylyric
July 23
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Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
Shannon Rose
Mari Goes
July 23
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Oh, I think I sense a breakthrough there! I even think I see a smile! Yes?! Hopes are never too high, we owe that to ourselves, to have and keep hope, huge ones