an immediate need for distraction
stop holding your breath
shit, I suck at rolling cigarettes
it's not the words you heard
but the implied connection,
intruding
the perceived threat
you get to forget again
I'm being taunted by that
empty Cheetos can
in
out
stop listening to your breathing,
you know that freaks you out
almost
I love you Spiderman
but Wolverine could kick your ass
done
Author notes
panic disorder
who needs a drink
fighting the brain with the pen
Comments
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lmao...
the last part was priceless
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I know how those cheetos cans can be.
I really liked this, it seemed light hearted and fun to me, actually, until I read the author notes. The ending about the comic characters struck me but I guess I read this a different way from what you intended.
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I hate panic attacks. I think you've about summed it up!
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This was cathartic. Worked surprisingly well. Thanks
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The way you formatted this poem lends to the air of desperation that is so prevalent during a panic attack. Cleverly penned!
Mariana
LOL@ who needs a drink
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Wow. 'stop holding your breath' as instruction to self - who is speaking, and who is holding?
the metaphysics of poetry, and the absolute bravery of taking a feeling and nailing it on paper like this - so very well done
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This sporadic presentation reminds me of a mind I am all too familiar with. LOL I tend to think in jolted wisps of thought, jumping from one to another with no consistency. Your poem is well thought out as far as design is concerned and even moreso with fleeting moments that wane.
I happen to agree with the thought that Wolverine could beat Spiderman. LOL
The visual of "rolling the cigarette" reminds me of those days when I could not afford the regular pack because I wanted drugs too. Whew! I am glad, and highly favored, those days are over, just for today.
I have lived in this world. Mine was self-inflicted by my desire to use alcohol and crack (together). You took me back. Uneasy as it is to go there, I tend to leave the door ajar, as to remind me not to enter in again.
I loved this! Thanks for stopping by my works. I haven't been on much lately. I am presently working hard at publishing and producing. It is good to witness your poetry once more dear friend.
Always ♥
Renee
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First of all, I immediately love the style of this one. The formatting is perfect, especially for this subject - it kind of mimics the way the panicked brain gets scattered or drawn into different sidelines in rapid-fire succession.
Ahh... I was always a Wolverine fan myself - not so much one for Spidey, for some reason (though the movies are pretty decent).
It seems a little paranoid in the middle - is that my imagination?
I could almost imagine the speaker shaking/trembling while trying to roll a cigarette, eyes darting back and forth and all around looking for some perceived threat.
Excellent rendering of a person in the middle of a panic. People who have not experienced this would be hard-pressed to understand, but upon reading your poem - I think they'd gain a lot of insight.
You are "bloody brilliant" as always!
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lolol thanks. yeah, that was defiently paranoia, a common side effect of the attacks, well, a defining feature of them to be sure lol. Thank god they don't happen as much anymore. Your opinion on this one carries a lot of weight, and I was waiting to hear it, because I knew you'd get it, and also cuz I wrote it in the middle of the attack, so my perspective is, well, skewed lol.
I collected Wolverine comics as a kid, always a fan, too, but can't help loving Spidey. Don't know what it is. I think what I love most about them both are the things they have in common, so it was always difficult for me to pick one over the other. I dunno. I could go on forever about comic book heroes lol. -
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I'm honored that my "opinion carries a lot of weight"!
I hate that you have those attacks at all... but I think, in a way, something might be gained from them. You know?
I like comic book heroes too! We're such geeks!
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Yeah, there are things to be gained. I mourn my progressive inability to bear some of my favourite stuff, though, like psychological thrillers. I can never watch The Green Mile or Trainspotting again, and they are such good movies! I watch half the Saw movies with my eyes closed. They are a bit extreme, though...just a bit. (haha)
Geeks rock
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Well, anyone could kick movie-Spiderman (a la Tobey Maguire)'s emo butt. I hate the movies for ruining my favorite childhood superhero. But, yes there is no one like Wolverine in the comics. ** Stopping her geek musings**
I like this piece. -
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Thank you! It was such a difficult one to express. Ten minutes of writing out my attack became a full hour of trying to format it for clarity. I appreciate you coming by and making me feel better about it lol
Spiderman was always my first love, too, and then Wolverine second, but I had to be honest with myself about who kicked more butt. The thought popped in and made me laugh, dispelling the mood, so it had to be included. I expect someone will object eventually
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It's very difficult to express what you've expressed without sounding cheesy / or like a geeky fan, but your piece does it very well. I don't think I could address this subject with nearly this much grace. I like the comics Marvel did with Spiderman and Wolverine together. He always called him "Wolvie." What did Wolverine call him again? Anyway, the Spiderman of the comics is so much cooler / funnier / STRONGER. I like this poem.
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I don't even remember what Wolverine called him. I had those comics. What a lousy fan I turned out to be lolol. Now I'm gonna have to go find out again...
Thank you
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I have discovered that if you are viewing this with your text size set over medium, it screws up the formatting. I have done all I can with it, so unfortuantely, you will have to lower your text size to medium to see the lines properly!
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