by Gregg Rowe
Alice looking through the looking glass never saw the ghastly sight reflection of her
emaciated face. The force of being thrown into a coffee table left the freckled skin
around her hazel eye to turn a deep blue/yellow/green. The swelling of her
tender skin was masked beneath red scratches from torn epidermis, beneath the blood
that poured freely to produce the deep blue/green/yellow mass that covered half her face.
Alice looking through the looking glass never saw the blemished lips
that gingerly kissed me good-night as a baby. She covers
her anger with a smile, picks up the Mary Kay cosmetics and with a right
eye shut and the other blankly staring at the pitiful sight.
I see her lips move to the rhythm of an excuse, to tell me
that she loves me and will protect me and then she threw me out.
Alice looking through the looking glass never saw my tortured nine
year-old face as earlier in the evening I saw the black-tied tuxedoed
man I call my father swipe at her like she was a crystal glass on the coffee table.
Author notes
Angels Among Us
Break the silence...make the call
Alice, I shouldn't have to tell readers who follow my poetry, but for newcomers, represents my mother...I'm reading 'Alice in Wonderland' when this incident happened in our house and ironically 'The Honeymooners' is playing in the background on a black-and-white screen TV with rabbit ears and that famous line comes: "One of these days Alice, just one of these days! Straight to the MOON!"
Written January 28th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- Awareness by QueenT.
500 points, ended December 20, 2005, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Week Without Violence by Xakward--silenceX.
525 points, ended December 17, 2006, 5 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Women Who Sleep on Stones by A60sMan.
700 points, ended December 22, 2008, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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The Alice in Wonderland usage isn't very creative IMO. Also this poem is as much about you as "Alice". The strength of competition kept this piece from doing better.
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You kind of make it hard to do *anonymous* judging when you sign your name to the poem, good thing I haven't read any of your work before,lol.
Good use of vocabulary and description. I think you should of found a different way to say 'blue/yellow/green'because although it was somewhat descriptive it lacked something and through off the flow a bit (for me).
The ending was great. I truly liked the last few lines. They pulled together a strong ending and proved that you could truly keep your great description up all the way through. Thank-you for entering my contest, I wish you well in it.
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A very thought provoking peice, this was really sad, I feel that it needed a little more emotion, but other than that it was well written thanks fr entering and good luck in the contest. All the best xxxx QueenT oooo
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You inspire me beyond words... I have been to your author page, read some of your works.. You are truly one of the few that people are lucky enough to know. Your story is breathtaking in itself and I found myself fond of you after just reading what little you allowed us to see on your author page. You are by far an amazing writer and I am honored that you would take the time to enter my contest. Thank you so much. Much luvs~Crys
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My grandmother is forever saying to me "I'll send you to the moon Alice" and I never knew what it was from til now.
I'm only new to your poetry, but I could tell what you meant straight away.
I suppose that after such a long time of a repetitive event, you wouldnt notice the effects as much as others do, especially children...
xx -
Woah... thsi poem is awesome. I loved it. Thanks for entering. Good luck in the contest!
Jenny -
Thanks for the entry. Good luck.
Lo
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Awesome
You cleverly set a mood and rhythm that enhanced the brutality of the event. I saw these images through nine year old eyes.
Awesome! -
ummmm riight
-lacer
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Good writing, that is a very effective way of getting a point across, very effective.
David -
Very powerful poem. ITs not quite what I expected for this contest but it was very good. This will be considered in my judging. Thanks for entering and Good Luck.
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We share a memory, a little different of course... however (as is yours i asume) stained in our minds forever. Abusive father/husbands NEED to stop.
This is a great write, and i love how i can relate!
good luck
-allison -
wow. This was a very deep and disturbing piece. You have been through a lot. I love the way this was written, the use of Alice also was very interesting. This was a good piece of work.
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Such a lovely twist on Alice. I am off to read more, and get some insight of the world of poetic bliss.
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If I don't let the ghosts escape they rape my mind, and I need it to graduate with, so writing is my solace to get the demons out...thanks for the comment and I hope that through your awakening that you also find peace like when I do when I finsih the last word to every poem.
Edited on Mar 30, 11:52 because 'spelling (as usual), why don't they put the spell check up here for messages also'. -
I love how you write out your ghosts... Just amazing. I used to watch my father beat my mother all the time... and when he wasn't on her, he was on me.. I have an Alice too... I use her in my poetry alot... or used to when I would write about it.. She's the one that went through that horrible mess as a child, not me.... Silly huh? It works though. I know by reading your poems I'm going to be stepping on all sorts of landmines in my head... but something in me wants to.
A brilliant write poet.
Edited on Mar 29, 10:06 because ''. -
wow
wow this piece is so intense and emotional great write
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Great
Wow, this was so powerful! The wording was fantastic and you definitely should not have to deal with things like this, at any age. I feel for you- and this poem is just amazing- pure poetry. I'll be back to check out more from you!
~Zeek
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