generic typewriter on a desk
drawers open
carpet stained with coffee
windows wreathed in dew
clothes crumpled on the floor
bedsheets disheveled
uprooted pages pulsing
pushing daisies through
their words
phone screaming
no one listening
glistening glock in hand
hurt human silent
birds seducing daylight
the wind provoking life
unturned stones telling secrets
to the untarnished grass
quiet quiet relief
in a loud mouth world
wording as simple as "I quit"
this purpose of reality
story teller off a curl of chaos
entering a new realm
a siren at a traffic light
a gentle knock at the door.
A contest entry
- Not Ready for Monday by Danna Hobart.
550 points, ended August 9, 18 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I loved this very much, except one line just didn't work for me. I know, I sound like I am being picky.
bedsheets disheveled
When I read this, I thought that it sounded too ordinary among all the other images and metaphors you used. I wonder if you can come up with an image to describe the bedsheets instead of an adjective.
Thank you for entering my contest.
-
Some familiar phrasings in here ...
Who is there?
Love you.
Myra
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