Pain fills my skies
consuming my heart
with darkness.
Artificial light dances
across the black
and tempts my eyes.
I am not swayed
by his movements
meant merely to tease.
The stars appear,
and my path is lit
by celestial enlightenment.
A constellation
of promises remind me
of the coming morning.
Hope breaks on
the distant horizon
and soothes my heart
Author notes
Inspired by the song "Sorrow"
In a list
A contest entry
- Breathe today (Flyleaf inspired prompts) by AshleyAesthetic.
319 points, ended July 28, 4 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
Lovely!
I love how you can actually FEEL the movement in the poem, mirroring his svelte movements... it's a bit mesmerizing actually.
I love how you chose shorter line lengths and shorter stanzas for this - it makes it easier to digest every line - as if the reader is meant to follow every movement the way you'd watch every movement in a tease, or with a lover you were suspicious of.
The way you word things is wonderful... I miss your poetry! I need to read you more often!
-
Wow this is simply breath-taking. I love the metaphors you used, and the way each word dances on the tip of my tongue.
Perfect
Thank you for entering -
I love this.
I was about to write my poem about this song, because "Sorrow" is also one of my favorites, but I didn't.
You're really talented.
-
Beautiful...a breath to notably take, Wonderful write. Blessings.
-
lovely...I enjoy every stanza..especially this one:
I am not swayed
by his movements
meant merely to tease.
good job!
Adding your comment:
1 - 5 of 5
