I try so hard
But you push me away
Maybe a flower
Or a nice word to say
But they don’t just work out
and back to where we started
you never seem
to be ok with me
whatever I do
is not enough to see
so why when I get worn out
you pain yourself we parted
why don’t you
just try to read my heart
when I send you a kiss
do I want us apart?
It is not that complicated
And here back to where we started
I’ll try again
Be patient with me
I do have feelings
Always hurt by thee
But they heal up so fast
And wouldn’t take any time
Being hurt is human
And is not that of a crime
I don’t want to be a daughter
I want to be your friend
I want to share secrets with you
And share love with no end
You say you want that
So why you re-build the wall?
Between you and me
When it’s about to fall
Daddy I love you so much
I really do
and wish you would show
the way you love me too
A contest entry
- & I tasted beauty when you told me I wasn't human in your eyes by Re-invention.
580 points, ended August 15, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
so what was the first impression?
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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interesting write. please state which option you chose
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Great Work...
u showed how much a youngster might suffer just to reach a fair relationship with his parents.
I like most of ur poems because they are written to reveal whts inside most of the people but they cant say..
Well Done..
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Thank you alot for your comment and thanx for you sweet words
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ur welcome...
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thanx alot for your comment and for your time and i'll sure try to make use of your advice
thanx again -
This is a great subject for you to write about (a strained relationship with your father). The poem is a little choppy in places but I like the message you are tring to send. Work on the flow a little bit and you will have something wonderful. Go and get em!
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