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Gentle Language

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Heaven is rhythmic here inside our smiles,

sighs escape lips and transform your beauty

into magical curves of pure white light.

 

Always a flicker away from these eyes:

blue/grey winters that scoop up summer life,

fashion our love into desire's strong bonds.

 

Sleep will gather together our journeys,

roll them and wrap them into future times,

where we can untangle - throw the minds high

 

into clouds that sprinkle nature for us.

Skin upon skin, my cheek soaks your heartbeat,

takes the notes across the tongue and swallows

 

their depths of fantastic life inside life,

new, this brand new personality laughs

its existence right through our wondrous seas.

 

Evening's smooth, soft tide waves its goodbyes

as night stretches stars and yawns old suns out

to grace vision: fluttering through awake-

 

asleep within the cool moments breathing

and we dance fingers in between fingers,

a silent operatic performance.

 

Hair caressed - stroked towards infinity,

I strip your scent of chemicals and drown

in its magnificent simplicity.

 

Strolls through imagination's opening,

invisible feet, eternity's sand

kicked as this welcome release cracks time's grin,

 

sensuality whispers into me,

this gentle language rests upon your breast

with fascination, our child will be loved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

i n d i v i d u a l i t y http://stores.lulu.com/chasingtheday

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Comments

1 - 54 of 54

  • libithina
    October 30

    Edit | Reply
    with the image of your avatar flickering in the corner of my eye this took on a dream like quality of such beauty .. caught and enraptured in evey word .. wonderful as ever Ian s Lib xxx


  • Kiran silver member
    October 30

    Edit | Reply
    This is really stunning! As usual your imagery is wonderful and the poem leaps out at you and you just want to continue reading. I loved this piece!

  • arjun v s 391
    October 23
    Edit | Reply

    great poem


  • Deceits Tears silver member
    October 16

    Edit | Reply
    My friend I cannot tamper with perfection, nor can I choose a part that stands out In your pieces, from start to finish as always a piece of art
    Kudos


  • individuality gold member
    September 28
    Edit | Reply
    A Wild Spirit

    Like a wild spirit
    in another life's dream -
    screams of eternity
    scroll across the soul's sigh,
    and language beats
    inside the battered realms,
    where ruffled tears
    collect in the body's musical.
    I flower into a flower
    that wanders love.

  • judmc
    September 22

    Edit | Reply

    Clever Vocabulary

    I strip your scent of chemicals and drown in its magnificent simplicity
    Evening's smooth soft tides waves its goodbyes.Sensuality whispers into me
    this gentle language rests upon your breasts with fascination, our child will be loved. Some of my favourite metaphorical imagery in gentle language expressed.
    Keep writing (who can stop you) Best Wishes....George....
    P.S Many thanks for your kind comments on "The Drunk"glad you liked it


  • LunaBaby1414
    September 21
    Edit | Reply
    thanks for entering, good luck


  • Aussie Gypsy gold member
    September 20

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful, how I wish you'd been closer to the 20 line rule and I might have been able to slip this though. You capture so much emotion in this piece. best to you

  • makenamp
    September 18

    Edit | Reply
    I felt your story of how true your love is for whom ever this maybe, and yet you have a heart that is true and pure with time that heals and enjoy the simple life. You long for connection of one true self/spirit. I applaud you and your talent, SPEAK LOUDER! I love it.


  • sighingflosser.
    September 17
    Edit | Reply
    yesyesyes.


  • Snowing Kisses gold member
    September 14
    Edit | Reply
    complete and utter compelling beauty bravo...and thankyou...this is enchantingly good
    Tt


  • glenn shannon silver member
    September 12
    Edit | Reply
    sensual and very nice congrats on previous goldies well deserved cool ending too clever man


  • mgmc gold member
    September 9

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful imagery in a very well written and tender poem. Small wonder it won two gold trophies. Very well deserved. A beautiful poem.


  • toomysterious
    September 8

    Edit | Reply
    Wonderful, great depth and exquisite sensual imagery with a superb finish. Obviously Gold caliber from the start. Your trophy is more than deserved. You drew me in and wrapped me in the many layers this poem contained. Bravo!


  • John BoSox
    September 8

    Edit | Reply
    The eigth stanza ie outstanding..I loved it..Wonderfull imagery, as well..I can feel your thoughts and emotions whisping back and forth between the marvelous choice if wording you utilize, from start to finish.. The fine ending was worth the spellbounding adventure.You have a manner of pulling the reader into your tunnel of mystique and not allowing them to exit until you are through with them..This is so important in poetry..You seem to get it..good for you.What more can I say....You nailed this..Wow

    John


  • Eric Marsh
    September 8

    Edit | Reply
    WONDERFUL..YOU PAINT PICTURES WITH WORDS..EACH WORD A DELIGHT TO SEE AND TASTE,,EACH POEM A SYMPHONIC DELIGHT..A TONE POEM...GREAT STUFF..and yes i am trying desperately to copy your unique style..well we all have to start somewhere..so go sue me lol.....haha nice one my mate..lets get drunk...keep well and keep writing..........


  • stasis
    September 7
    Edit | Reply

    yes

    Beautiful imagery and concept.
    Please wait for the other judge to comment.


  • The kiss is Thirst gold member
    September 6

    Edit | Reply

    A worthy double gold winner!

    This is incredible. As I dive headfirst into your wonderful words I am overcome with splendid emotion. You capture the heart and mind with this utter work of art. I leave a but it should be a bouquet


  • SpydurPoet gold member
    September 6

    Edit | Reply
    Once again, the imagery that you portray in your poetry is absolutely captivating. It brings the words to life and closer to a photograph or memory. Amazing.
    Write on.
    ~*~SP~*~


  • Vernal Bloom
    September 5
    Edit | Reply
    Afarin

  • I love this write from start to finish. It is truly a beautiful write and I loved it. Thank you so much for entering my contest and good luck hun! Great write!


  • Heavenly Angel silver member
    August 17

    Edit | Reply
    I think this is a beautiful write
    Your wording is awesome and this is arranged wonderfully
    Thank you for sharing; all the best to you


  • Vernal Bloom
    August 12

    Edit | Reply
    And also such a gentle language was used here how nice you ended the thought, I myself usually don't know what to do with my poems while I have to end them I know your answer, because you're a poet and I'm not
    A good poem, Friend and all the best


  • Poetrist
    August 2
    Edit | Reply
    Very beautiful! I enjoyed both the opening and the end.
    Well done!
    Good luck


  • Oleander
    August 2
    Edit | Reply
    Lovely.

  • another incredible installment...nothing short of amazing...the grace and softness is overwhelming...the first three lines gripped me, tight...the read was an embrace...i adore the third stanza...brilliant and remarkable


  • ShaShay
    July 26

    Edit | Reply
    Ah, yes. I remember the sweet feelings aroused when carrying my children. No other time in life can compre as far as I'm concerned. Beautiful write.
    Sharon


  • Rick Weston silver member
    July 21

    Edit | Reply
    lovely work. can be read and re-read with enjoyment each time. I really dig the second to last stanza - just an amazing three lines.

  • .


  • DesolatELifE
    July 17
    Edit | Reply
    You should change your font and all that in anonymous contests, so you're anonymous (I hope you're who I think you are, or I'll sound a little silly). Doesn't matter to me though. I'd have non-anonymous if I was a gold member anyway.

    Pretty poem. The occasional almost subtle rhyme. Very nice.

  • i'm just here to steal points from you

    what i love so much about your poetry is it toys with the brain and forces me to think, it draws me in with it's abundance of rich imagery... and makes me dream.

    i dont think i'll ever tire of reading your work.

    what an incredible write, my friend xx


  • mre
    July 17

    Edit | Reply
    The use of metaphors often indicates a mind set alight. Idiots attempting to copy such acquit expose themselves by the pesky effect their routines induce. That, and the fact they elicit to rearrange their face. I enjoyed the magnificent complexity here.

  • Gorgeous

    The imagery in this was absolutly amazing

  • Splendid.

  • Beautifully penned...

    I love your style of writing...
    Such imagery, depth & beauty pour from your words in any genre you put quill to parchment...
    Awesome as always...
    Keep up the good work...
    Well done!!!


  • Draig aine gold member
    July 15

    Edit | Reply

    sighing again

    the first stanza captivated me

    Heaven is rhythmic here inside our smiles,
    sighs escape lips and transform your beauty
    into magical curves of pure white light.

    then each builds like a wave cresting, magical, and another sigh


  • Junkyard
    July 13
    Edit | Reply
    wonderful poem as always....

  • I am humbled, spell bound, amazed; how your words like music plays out a melody of delight...I love it


  • Lurie
    July 13

    Edit | Reply

    Perfection!!!

    Well Ian, after what I just posted I really needed to read this beauty from you! Made me smile, thank you! ~Laura


  • poetryality silver member
    July 13

    Edit | Reply

    Brilliant!



    "Skin upon skin, my cheek soaks your heartbeat,
    takes the notes across the tongue and swallows"


    It is always a pleasure to breathe in your thoughts, sentiments, well chosen words, and fascinating metaphors. ~Sigh

    Keep doing what you do and never change your screen name.


    Always ♥

    Renee

  • I found the secret message in your poem and like it very much! The last word of the message is "loved" and that really sets it off. OH, maybe I should not have told. ???

  • this was stunning and very quaint


  • Girl in Red
    July 13

    Edit | Reply
    Wonderfully said and I did find the mystery message inside this poem! You can pat me on the head now.


  • moonlitanime
    July 13

    Edit | Reply
    you are definably a true poet all of your work turns out with the poetical grace that fulls your deep wisdom making your poems even more powerful than there was before. You have a natural talent that many has to fight for to death.

  • heaven's rhythmic beauty is life inside life, a child loved.

    a very gentle poem.

  • This is just amazing. There were so many lines that I loved in this. Wonderful poetry indeed

  • Awesome!!

    I'm wishing you all the best, Poet!!
    Peace & hugs,
    xx Cyn xx

  • Macsword
    July 12

    Edit | Reply

    These lines...

    seemed to me to set up your final 3 stanzas well,


    Evening's smooth, soft tide waves its goodbyes

    as night stretches stars and yawns old suns out

    to grace vision: fluttering through awake-



    asleep within the cool moments breathing

    and we dance fingers in between fingers,

    a silent operatic performance.

    But I can sense that love bug's presense in every line. You're smitten for sure


  • PinkPony
    July 12

    Edit | Reply
    I do wish you had children. They would be scamps and very, very talented and funny. I cracked the code on this poem. You take the first two words from the first stanza and the first four words from the second stanza... and then you do more stuff and it is fun to do! Smarty pants.

  • Oh my..Your romantic poetry is absolutely mind blowing. This is stunning Ian.. just beautiful. Sigh... But..ALL you work exceeds excellence.

  • WOW! such a beautiful piece of poetry carrying one along on a summer breeze of deepest intimicy with soothing imagery stroking the senses with hope's for a brighter day embraced by birth love and life

    A wonderful poem, Ian... a real pleasure to read!


  • Mariana gold member
    July 12
    Edit | Reply
    Breathtakingly beautiful.

    Mariana  

1 - 54 of 54