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I let you down

since day  one i told you that i would be there for you
so many nights i held you when you wasnt well
i let you down in so many ways
i should have came around more i should have said so much more
i also thought that i would have another day with you
since day one i was there when you needed me
our first date to our last tears together to the last goodbye
we were so crazy back in the days
i let you down the days when you needed
i should have held you tighter
i should have done so many more things with you
i let you know that it was ok to let go
you didnt need the pain
just i could not see you have that kind of pain
i let you know that i love you
and i knew it was coming but i could not prepare myself for this
i thought that i would be fine but i was so far from being fine
when i walked into the room i could never thougth it
would be that bad
the last kiss before they took you
i will cherish that forever
i let you down cause iwas not there the day you died
i should have been holding your hand when you let go
i let us both down
cause i told you that i would be there till the end
and in my eyes i wasnt there
i love you till i see you again
my friend
i will hold you in my heart


forever

Author notes

this is to my best friend and ex lover
william alan biggs

A contest entry

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Comments


  • Antebellum
    July 14

    Edit | Reply
    'i let you down in so many ways
    i should have came around more i should have said so much more
    i also thought that i would have another day with you
    since day one i was there when you needed me
    our first date to our last tears together to the last goodbye'

    I've been on the other side of this part.
    Only thing that 'errks' me is that the "I's" aren't capitalized.

    thanks for entering. good luck :]

  • Juno101
    July 13
    Edit | Reply
    Yo, I wasn't moved by this poem, I believe your emotions are real but things like this are said all the time and I feel like this is no different from thousands of other poems. It wasn't bad but very common and bland.I didn't find a voice that is original. It was well written. Thanks for joining in my moresome.


  • BluRosePoet8488
    July 11

    Edit | Reply
    Shannon,
    I think you did an exceptional job with the emotions of this poem. They feel raw, frayed, almost torn. I do see some words that need not be there and some words that maybe need their tense changed. Other than capitalization and basic grammar... you have a well written poem full of emotion that is well expressed through the sadness felt while reading this. Keep the ink flowing and good luck. If you need more help... don't hesitate to IM me. Love and hugs...
    ~Donna~