I want to be the one within your arms,
to be the one you nestle in the night,
the one you cherish each and every day,
the one you always greet with fond delight.
I’m quite enchanted by your many charms.
It is your heart and hand that I am after.
How could it be that we are not together?
How can it be that you resist my charms?
Your passion for me shows; you know I’m right.
I know you want to have me come and stay.
What do you think it is that you must fight?
Give over now, come rest within my arms.
Author notes
An Echoed Baby Butterfly Sonnet with fully enveloped wings (the form standard) written in iambic pentameter with feminine rhymes in Lines 7 and 8. In this Echoed variation, the A(1) and A(2) echoed lines are distinct from each other (Lines 1 and 12, and Lines 5 and 8, respectively) and contain echoes both in theme/imagery and with repeated end-of-line words.
2009 July 11
In a list
Thank you for reading. Critical commentary welcome.
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Beautiful piece, and I like the way the form breaks up the presentation and feeling of the poem here. Nice write.
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Thank you very much.
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a good poem, was just looking then at the form here, i have not really bothered with forms much for ages other than my own lol vanity eh
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Thanks! Well, "to each their own" then, eh?
I had fun creating this form. I plan to work on some other versions, including a full (14-line) butterfly.
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I have always considered the first, and perhaps only universal requirement for a sonnet is 14 lines. liked your idea and tour poem.
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Thank you. The standard Butterfly does contain 14 lines. This version is the baby butterfly, containing only 12. I felt free to take liberties after my researches reveal a sonnet form that contains 10 1/2 lines (exactly 3/4 of 14 lines) and another that contains 20 lines. I decided to do two versions (full and baby) in order to be able to incorporate different rhyme schemes more easily.
I did spend time analyzing what it was that seemed to be the core of what a sonnet is. Some retain the 14 lines total and break the stanzas up into different lengths. Some do not require a volta. I decided my basic would include 14 lines, have the option of a volta, but put what is typically the ending into the middle of the poem. I suppose the fact that I am not a classically trained poet means I feel quite free to bend or break rules as suits me.
Thanks for reading and sharing your knowledge of sonnets. I am always looking to expand my knowledge.
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Lovely - and a new form for me, beautifully realised.
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Thank you very much!
Please, feel free to play with and enjoy the form. I look forward to people coming up with their own variations on it.
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Clever.
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Thanks, bro.
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