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mandolin

 

 


my body echos the shape of your lap.

I wish you closer,
daily, your hand always
where I softly splash into song.

being held in the contours of your warmth
fully explains this intimate sound
that soars above my breath,

the way pear blossoms tremble
when the wind plucks them
from the branches


and they hang
like notes on the air

 

 

 

 

 

 

 






 

Author notes

mandolin, guitar...together we are what music feels like, what love sounds like

Nicolette

Prompt:
"I shall wrap my tender tendrils
around your sturdy roots,

climbing into the skies
of your song..."

excerpt from: “Promise”
by Wanda Lea Brayton (Night Hope)
http://allpoetry.com/poem/4003721

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 48 of 48

  • Shibboleth
    November 23
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    "And they hang
    like notes in the air"

    And like those words, poet. Beautiful.


  • ccawley gold member
    October 17
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    You're a wonderful poet.


  • kaibab silver member
    October 14

    Edit | Reply
    I think I feel the wave of strum, having love through every star...so lovely...

  • Topnotchsy
    September 15

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful piece here. I love the title and imagery it alone evokes. Such a beautiful instrument, the mandolin and the way you tie it to the poem is lovely.


  • marc creamore
    August 8

    Edit | Reply
    Ah . . . once again I find myself trembling and in awe at the beautiful delicacy of your words . . . Whenever I need to feel the soft caress of a dove's wing at dawn I turn to Nicolette and find myself in the arms of peace.

    Marc

  • Virgoan
    August 3

    Edit | Reply
    beautiful my friend from opening to the end like a rustle of wind.


  • CaliOkie silver member
    July 28

    Edit | Reply
    Well deserved bronze. Always you create the most beautiful and delicate images, so light they defy gravity and float in mid-air. I love the second stanza in particular:

    I wish you closer,
    daily, your hand always
    where I softly splash into song.

    I love it when you splash into poetry and can only imagine you splashing into song.
    Stunningly beautiful, this is just excellent.

    Garrison


  • thepoetssoul
    July 27

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully written, your poetry is always so well thought out.
    You express so much through so little.
    Be blessed in all you do.

    Tony


  • LadyElbereth
    July 24

    Edit | Reply

    I am Trembling

    Sometimes when I read I save the best for last this gifts me not only inspiration but begs me to remember how strong a simple word can be…I am in awe of your work but then you knew I would be. How can I say anything more than what has already been stated…with that I will go with a fullness that you alone can gift…be well that pen of yours for she is much cherished.


    Lady E


  • simone waters
    July 21

    Edit | Reply
    ohh.. I shall finger-feed beauty back to you using your own imagery, nicolette: your poem is a "pear blossom trembling...hanging, plucked by air"

    how delectable it tastes.

    my my my, this is a wondrous, dear poet. Congratulations!


  • Stuart Higginson gold member
    July 21

    Edit | Reply
    You know ... I find it very difficult to concentrate on your works, because every opening line you publish online sends me into a desperate urge to go and write something new of my own. An urge I of course battle til the end, to ensure I remain as attentive as your words deserve and demand! You inspire me, lol!!!

    I adore the mandolin. Except in some Japanese music, it seems much underused in these modern times; I love things Celtic and Medieval, and have a love of fantasy .... mandolins always make me think of Kings and Queens in Courts ... of wandering troubadours passing green hills to visit and take their stories and songs to the next dales of men. You have indeed brought it into the modern day, and so beautifully. The pear tree imagery ... the fruit as suspended chords ... breathtaking

    Have you ever formatted your work to audio? I am sure you would produce some wonderful cd collections of your poetry, spoken as you intended them to sound, maybe to music, maybe only "as" the melodies of your words ...


  • Danny Beatty gold member
    July 20

    Edit | Reply
    I read this masterpiece and remembered more than romance, but the spiritual power and receiving blood of the world of smaller and of more powerful things than myself ... It reminds me of a dying little bird, and the hand I held as I watched it tremble. It reminds me of the first kiss I wanted, and even more of the one I got.

    I shall make this short. You have ripped my heart away with this poem and it has by your skillful art become emboldened and returned stronger and more lithe.

    thank you

    utterly, a masterpiece from a poet of all arts

    it speaks for itself


    Danny


  • poet2angels gold member
    July 19

    Edit | Reply
    This is exquisite
    Such beautiful words and the ending is a sigh~

    Lynda

  • kaibab silver member
    July 16
    Edit | Reply
    You are the best at finding the elegance in the power of truth...this is quite lovely and makes me wish to be a pear blossom...


  • IronIcecream
    July 12
    Edit | Reply

    nice change of perspective


  • SabaSophiya
    July 12

    Edit | Reply
    Brilliant take on the prompt! Stunning imagery! Your fantasy floats like musical notes in the air. Way to go, dear poet! Wish you all the best for the contest!

    Blessings,
    Sophie


  • Peteskid gold member
    July 11

    Edit | Reply
    lovely poetry, we can seem to fit, like the pieces of nature we see every day, like many things in the world around us, if we can see...beautiful...PK


  • tstock
    July 11

    Edit | Reply
    the third phrase reminds me of haiku, especially with the reference to pear blossoms.

    my daughter plays mandolin and i think she would enjoy reading this


  • crisstiena
    July 11

    Edit | Reply
    Absolutely beautiful. But no more than I have come to expect from such a talented poet. Sometimes I am almost afraid to read your work, because I know
    you will wrench my heart and have me in tears. This poem has an almost oriental feel to it - so delicate, like a fragile, tiny bird let loose from a lover's heart...

    much love and good luck
    ~ c♥


  • Namita
    July 11

    Edit | Reply
    ahh this is so beautiful...i'vent read ANY ppoetry in a long,long, long time and i'm glad that i clicked on this one... i love the last line... AND I LOVE LOVE what you've put in your author's notes this certainly sounds like love

    namita


  • AutumnGypsy gold member
    July 11

    Edit | Reply
    Oh my lord sweetheart, this is so beautiful, you are the queen of such beautiful imagery, always so easily on the eye and ear. I stand and applaud everytime I read you. Beautifully done.


  • SteveS gold member
    July 10
    Edit | Reply
    Very pretty poem..the ending imagery is quite dreamy.

  • tara wilson gold member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    reading your poetry is always like taking a mini vacation, and it's always to somewhere new & exciting. this is so beautiful Nic!


  • Mari Goes gold member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    Your poem has the warmth as the notes that come of a mandolin. Soothing, sensual and lovely

    Mari


  • sweet arrival gold member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    i absolutely love the imagery in this... there isn't much that is more graceful than the blossoms lifted in the palms of breezes. watching that brings such peace.

    written in a way that i sighed with... well, almost every line actually. this is the first poem that is going into my list 'keepers' that i made for poems like this one.. ones i dont want to forget, ones i wish i wrote.

    i hope this does well in the contest for you.

  • grm
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    a mandolin is too small for my ginormous hands, lol.

    but i know this melody and all the lyrics to it




  • Night Hope gold member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply

    This is, of course, a beautiful love song as only you can write. Such tender imagery, such a profound mosaic of words, woven in a silken cloth of brevity. Lovely, my Friend. Good luck in Danny's contest, Sweetie.



  • silverfish
    July 10
    Edit | Reply
    i like the subtle, natural marriage of the artistic forms of poetry and music here. -silverfish


  • sykotic
    July 10

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    just my style

    anything to do with music always interest me... but besides the fact that this poem involves music it kinda reminds me of someone i lost so long ago... thank yo so much for yet againallowing me the privalidge of learning from your work and i really do hope you keep up the good work

    mwah... jade(X)


  • Allyce May gold member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    I had an inkling that this may be absolutely beautiful before I even clicked on it - ding ding ding! I WAS RIGHT, lol! Makes me think back to some very inspiring musical themed contests you and some guy held

    I think the end is the strongest part of the poem, especially the last two lines, in conjunction with the plucking of pear blossoms of course! I just adore the notion of a blossom hanging in the air like a note, because music and flowers are two of my favourite things DOUBLE WHAMMY! The beauty, the wonder, the anticipation, the song - all tied together by your words. So lovely!


    • Nicolette gold member
      July 10
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      and now you make me remember that you won some of the the contests i and some guy hosted. thanks, allyce

  • Rowan gold member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    There's nobody else here that writes in softer lights and sounds...
    stunning hon. And you know it's coming...
    sigh.


  • Daizee silver member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    When the rain falls and I'm feeling sad, I need a book of your poetry to relight the fire inside me. I always come to you expecting greatness and I'm blown away...still..at just how great you are.


  • Matt E. Smith
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    that first line is one of the best sensual lines i've read in poetry to date...it struck me and let me know off the start this was going to be an excellent poem. you've created a lingering, slow-motion feeling here....really well done.


  • arafura gold member
    July 10
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    Beautiful. I am running out of superlatives to describe your poetry!


  • charcoal
    July 10
    Edit | Reply
    you have such a soft touch with words...

    beautiful beautiful poetry.


  • Cannonsfire
    July 10

    Edit | Reply

    my body echos the shape of your lap.

     

    The thought of being curled contented like that sums up the feel of the entire piece. It has an echo of sturdiness within the music. Soft notes and a timbre of a whisper C


  • NurseChilly gold member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    if music be the food of love, then play on...............
    ahh yes
    most beautimous, most most most
    blossoms on the trees


    • Nicolette gold member
      July 10
      Edit | Reply
      the music of love...the play me.... yes. thank you, gilly


  • Sonja
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    As you said... what love sounds like when the right player and instrument meet... Beautiful.
    ~Sonja~


  • whitecoffee
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    Such a gorgeous poem from the excerpt. I really like, "fully explains this intimate sound" In the end, I can hear the music. A great pleasure to read.


  • Emmyb gold member
    July 10

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    ooh. some very delicate images in this one. True to form, this is pretty - dainty, defined and delicious


  • MJ Donnelly gold member
    July 10
    Edit | Reply
    *sigh* so beautiful Nicky.


  • Andrew Norris
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    As a guitar player (not a good one) I am so drawn to this. The shapes of these instruments is so sensual and the holding, playing of them has a special intimacy. The line, 'softly splash into song' is a line of such inventive genius I shiver each time I read it. But as if all this was not enough the introduction of pear blossom is just sublime. The segue from pear shaped instruments to pear blossom just leaves me speechless. I shall never be able to pick up my guitar again without being haunted by this poem. That final stanza.....This is the most beautiful thing I have read from you, by anyone for a long, long time.

    • Nicolette gold member
      July 10
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      i can see you know your music and your instrument, Andrew, and I just love it that you've picked up the connection between pear blossoms and the half-pear shape of the mandolin and guitar. thank you so much for this lovely comment

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