The thievery was sweet
As a plum tree in the orchard
I plucked the early fruit
And it was ripe and succulent,
I was old enough to be her father.
A plump ticket in her bra and panties
She came without the baggage
That burdens an older woman
And smoldered with a statement,
I listened to the rhythms in her chest
And saw the deep river in those eyes
Develop a mist, tight as a keyhole,
I spiraled into the sky and beyond
As she trembled from the newness
And released, the taste of spring on my tongue.
What did you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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succulent and I competely understand the impulse to suck the pit dry.
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Very sensual indeed this piece there is something to the taste of a debutante so long as she is of age of course, we would not want to encourage things our society could not tolerate.
The poem itself is a nice slow and comfortable read.
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Well written poetry, the sense of the people and their feelings is very strong here...the imagery is very well done...PK
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This has a very different kind of sensuality in it,a mix of desire and romance, with nice metaphors.
Young women being attracted to older men is not unusual, I for one, am in relationship with someone older, and works very well.
I try not assume that all the poems I read is based in real facts, or directly related to the author. In this case, whether about your or not, doesn't matter much for you are over the 50 and the girl could perfectly be old enough to be plucked
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I really like this, younger women do tend to like the older men from time to time...it seems that we are not so egocentric and selfish as most of the younger bucks.
Peace
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lmao... I think it was well written, but i just can't get over the "plump ticket" aspect of the whole thing. That is one hilarious way to describe a woman.
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A few of the lines lead me to think the younger person is a virgin: example:As she trembled from the newness, and a few others...
If this is about a virgin and an older man I would have to question the morality of the older man but if I am mistaken and it is of two consenting adults then I would say the poem is very erotic and I appreciate the beauty in it.
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I would ask, what if it was a virgin, and they were of age? I have a few friends who did not experience sex until they were in their mid-twenties. Where exactly does a morality issue come into play....just wondering.
Peace -
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Well if you really want an honest answer and that is a sincere question then I will go ahead and reply by stating the obvious...
Morality isn't an issue so long as they are both consenting adults ( as I stated previously)
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I agree, no offense guy but it's kind of creepy
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I agree, this poem is well written. I enjoyed the whole thing. bravo!
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it has been long since i read your work and it was so very refreshing. I must say, you will laugh at me, i am very attracted to men older than me. I find they much more mature in talk but often never let go of boyish ways...i like this. But 35 year old men dont like 22 year old women for keeps and sooo.....we both miss out. well wonderful job!
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I loved this!
I can relate..I am 30 years old and i am in love with a 54 year old man.
So everything you have said here rang oh so true in my ears!
I loved your word choice and your flow. A very nicely penned poem.
The first stanza really spoke out the most too me!
-Mandi
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