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The Lonely Vigil

 

 

 

 

The sun had fled the sky before the storm.
she stood upon the quayside in the gloom
the thunder deafened with a crashing boom;
her cloak wrapped tight around her tiny form.

     He perished many years ago at sea
     the ship and crew were swallowed by the deep,
     and now a lonely vigil she will keep
     knowing that her soul cannot be free.

She took her life that cold and dreadful day
her wailing rises with the ocean’s roar,
once a year she’s seen upon the shore
a misty form that slowly fades away.

     The seagull overhead shrieks one last cry
     as lovers bound by fate died with a sigh.

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Prompt ... Stories in traditional sonnet form.

Canadian sonnet ... rhyme scheme abba cddc effe gg

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 17 of 17
  • A lovely piec. (form of course) content was sad yet penned nicely. Enjoyable read. Congrats to you on the Silver


  • cricketjeff gold member
    July 19

    Edit | Reply
    Sad and dark, and I like the almost complete separation of the couplet from the rest, the rhyme and meter and volta, the technicalities, are all very strong; and the story suberb

    Thanks

    Jeff


    • Sue Cardwell gold member
      July 19
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you Jeff for the silver trophy in your contest, I appreciate it.

      Sue
      x


  • passim silver member
    July 16
    Edit | Reply
    A sad story and a beautiful sonnet.


  • Ellis gold member
    July 14
    Edit | Reply

    Outstanding

    This is at the Great Masterpiece level. Gives me goose bumps.


    • Sue Cardwell gold member
      July 14
      Edit | Reply
      I'm so glad you enjoyed this sonnet, many thanks for your comment.

      Sue
      x


  • Amera gold member
    July 8

    Edit | Reply
    What a wonderful read! It's sad but the imagery makes the reader actually feel the shoreline where she's standing. Classic! Wonderful!

    Love,
    Amera♥

    • Many thanks Amera, I appreciate your comment, especially as you write the best sonnets on the site.

      Love
      Sue


  • Eric Marsh
    July 6

    Edit | Reply

    mmmm

    i really like this poem it's spooky and sings reminds of when i was a lttle boy in merseyside..crawling through the smugglers caves tellin dark tales...great stuff..it makes me think and feel..great stuff.......

    • I am so glad that this poem bought back memories for you and you enjoyed it. Thanks for the lovely comment.

      Sue
      x


  • arafura gold member
    July 6
    Edit | Reply
    I love this! As Charles says below "we all have sailed on those stormy seas". A pleasure to read!

    • Thank you John as always your words are appreciated very much.

      Suzie Q
      x


  • csmmoms2
    July 5

    Edit | Reply
    A dreadful and beautiful story of love lost and we all have sailed on these stormy seas.

    "cold hearted orb that rules the night
    removes the colours from our sight
    red is grey and yellow white
    but we decide which is right
    and which is an illusion."

    -c

  • Wooo! This gave me chills!! I cannot pick a favorite stanza or line... I actually loved them all What powerful sadness! Great write

    • Thank you so much for reading and leaving a comment, I'm so glad you enjoyed the poem.

      Sue

1 - 17 of 17