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Strangler Fig

Missing image
I bet you thought you were doing well, climbing
toward the top at others’ expenses, didn’t you?

Well, you missed a step and
created a void under your feet
when you neglected that
protruding stub—oh fuck metaphors!

You neglected my cock, you fucking user, and now
others are reaching for it, clinging to it,
sucking it without sucking the life out of me, while
you’re only falling on your knees.

Author notes

Prompt: Rootless Tree by Damien Rice
Image found on dreamtime.com

A contest entry

What did you think

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Comments

1 - 31 of 31

  • Draig aine gold member
    July 15
    Edit | Reply

    congradulations on the bronze

    OH DEAR VITO, THER YOU GO,YOU HAVE DONE IT AGAIN. STILL GIGGLING


  • cazzy71
    July 14
    Edit | Reply

    erm

    Erm,this does not leave much to the imagination,does it now? Venomous,aggresive,harsh piece,that makes its point in an clear,slap you in the face way.Unlike most poetry I opt to read,but just as valid,just as relevant and just as worthy.Do you know if the person you wrote this for or about has read it,I would not want to see there face reactions if they have! Very good,spiteful poem.

  • hahahahaha! I DID NOT expect that at all... I was reading going "Man... this is deep" and thennn.... I literally laughed out loud. Cock neglect... rich.

  • Raw emotion much?

    Love it.

  • Oh Vito wonderfully done.

    A BRONZE...it was worth the gold..

    Love it.
    Xoxo

    Passions


    • DolceVito gold member
      July 9
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you, Passionate One...I have your beautiful words for consolation, and they're gold to me

  • you know, one of the greatest things about you is that you can place metaphors exactly where they should go, but when you want to say it straight up, you dont hesitate. congrats on the bronze... so well deserved, vito.


  • charcoal
    July 7
    Edit | Reply
    lol

    the reward is in the reading.

  • Powerful!!

    Left me speechless for once.
    I'm wishing you all the best in the contest
    And you keep on keeping on, Poet!!
    Peace,
    xx Cyn xx


  • sheltered
    July 6

    Edit | Reply
    lol... love the way this shifted
    from la te da to
    fucking say it like it is

    shocked me silly


  • Dixie Dawn gold member
    July 6

    Edit | Reply
    Dang! You grab me everytime!! What an awesome take on the prompt, I'm ever impressed my friend!

  • haha!

    Zomg at the last stanza!


    That was, a epic response to the prompt... lol.


    Good Luck in the Contest

  • HA! this was fucking great. that last stanza without the metaphor was raw but had a very humorous truth to it. thanks for entering.

  • OUCH! That hurt.

    • DolceVito gold member
      July 8
      Edit | Reply

      Thank you

      You can say that again only two happy clappy chappies, but I love you anyway


  • Emmyb gold member
    July 5

    Edit | Reply
    wow... this is passionate. really really passionate and very very good. loved how you told yourself off half way for using too many metaphors. well done.

  • OMG.... and it is Sunday have you no shame... lol
    roflmbo... my first impression after reading this was how funny it would be if a man was actually trying to tell a woman this with a serious face on sitting across from her face to face using those exact words from the beginning of this poem straight through to the end. ( especially if she was the blonde type who never reads or understands poetry!) Just the look on her face would be the worth sending in to market a spot for the new "priceless" commercial... roflmbo

    I have a contest that is in the process of being judged right now, not sure if you saw it, but it asked people to lie, one of the questions was: If there were no more churches, where/or what would you be doing on Sundays? ( can't remember the exact phrasing at the moment) Well dear... I think I know what your answer would be... lol Oh, wait, but you would have had to be required to lie, so am sure you would be saying something to the effect of preserving your virginity? lol

    • DolceVito gold member
      July 8
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much for your kind words, your support, Suzi; I love your comments

1 - 31 of 31