we were magic, now were tragic

all i want is to,
stop this crying
stop the feeling of dying-
stop wanting to keep trying-
but i cant,
and i wont,
and if i said that i even wanted to
id be lying-
but instead im crying
and trying to find
a piece of mind
peace of mind
a piece of my mind
that got lost-
or stolen
but its my fault
for being cut open-
but its what i chose
i suppose
its what i chose
because you were so beautiful
that my mind
froze-
like the time
and when it thawed out
i was left
behind-
and its tragic
its tragic
i tried to be tragic-
until i felt how we were magic-
we were magic
now were tragic
and i cant stand it-
rip out pages
from the dictionary
look for one about
truth-
about you and i-
and then go ask if we were ever more
than what they made us
out to be-
or from what she could see-
one true ember
floating up
and now
i might have given up on being
a lover
so i want to be
a writer-
and when i sit down
in front of my notebook
i'll try my hardest
to be
honest
i dont want my words
to burn
like Websters-
i dont want my words
to burn
at all-
i dont want to make you fall-
in any sense of the word
i just want to be heard-
and if you fell
then well-
youd be joining me
and then atleast
if you were there
i could say this to your face
instead of from all the way
over here.
i dont know why
or how
or what
ive only got the
who-
figured out
and its true-
for some fucked up reason
i'm in love
with you
and now ill go back to
waking up on
the bedroom floor
on cold cement
as a contortionist with
twisted limbs
and an unfamiliar ache
somewhere deep
within my
rib cage
from the nightmares-
ill try to shake away
the nightmares

ill try to shake away the nightmares-