you know you broke me & I'm glad.

dear atomic bomb,

I never thought of myself as closed. I always imagined myself like an open door, happy for anyone to visit and call upon my smile. At least, that's how I used to be.

Betrayal taught me how to close the curtains and turn the lights out - nobody's home, nobody can see the real me.

I remember the first time I saw you. Someone told me that you were no good - but I should've known his word was venom, it always was. I poured coke over your head and screamed 'screw you!'

I guess it makes us laugh now. I can't believe you broke down my security. I could've sworn my bouncers were strong enough to fight you off. I never thought of whether they could be charmed by an angel's face and a beautiful mind.

I thank God that my guard dogs fell asleep to your animal charms - without you, I know that beauty would only be a word that other people say.

Thank you for saving me from myself.

With heart that chimes,
Stef