man in the Chinese restaurant
sits at a corner table
empty plate rests in front of him
he holds a paperback firmly in his hands
and takes a breath after every sentence
as if he’s reading it out loud
shifts his position continually
one leg moves back and forth, nervously
but the pages turn slowly
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Great job with this and I love the imagery
that you used here. Good luck to you and
thanks for your entry!
Jeremy0826 -
x
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Nice
thats good i like this poem i love the imagery, short and precise - i am impressed.thanks for sharing -
I really like the character portraits you create
the description of this man is like so many people that I have seen - I love the contrast between "firmly" and "nervously" - wonderful!
Polly
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he holds a paperback firmly in his hands
and takes a breath after every sentence
as if he’s reading it out loud
-fuck,
that was simply
wow.
iloveit.
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Wow. This is amazing. The images portrayed were brilliant. You're an amazing writer. Awesome poem.
Write on.
~*~SP~*~
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Excellent. The images you paint are wonderful in their vibrant movement. The difference between the empty plates, the breathing, the book, the legs - so much going on all at once.
Lovely.
John
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brilliant
I love this. I love *being* captivated. Wonderful.
ahhhh so good.
the last three lines, oh this is just all I need tonight.
Thanks,
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