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Unfinished Business

Lying down six feet deep
In a cold and darkened chamber
Awakened from the dead of sleep
Hatred, I remember

Climbing up through dirt and sand
Evil bleeding from my eyes
Truth is captured from my hand
Fingers broken by your lies

It is not cold that sends shivers down your spine
But unwanted stares from shadows of your mind

A contest entry

I would like to revise. Suggestions would be helpful. Thank you.

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • Paloszoo gold member
    July 7

    Edit | Reply
    Second stanza is awesome. Excellent imagery throughout! Thanks for entering my contest and showing your work here. It's an honor to read it