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Falling into Love

Eyes see the invitation,
lips part as portals for passage of
first words:
Would you? Shall we?
Hands reach for touch,

and we dance upon a floor that is flat and fair.
You notice that I am tall without talking down
and I see the way your jaw line is set upon tomorrow;
we measure the fit within the beat
all the while.

Love is very much an opening
of, more than meeting,
whether once or many times.
A green light shines
within the places we haven't tried
and we cease to talk about what we have done before.






Author notes

Still learning, Still falling

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9
  • Synchronicity gold member
    August 7
    Edit | Reply

    The gradual dance

    Love in the gradual steps of the lips, hands, eyes, and deeper perception beyond the physical. This is how you captured the "falling" aspect of love. Not a tumble, or a stumble, but a dance. There is music in your poetry.


  • Fallen-Muse
    July 8

    Edit | Reply
    This was very interesting. I love how you determine love to be. Thank you so much for this and good luck!!!


  • xPink-Lotusx
    July 5

    Edit | Reply

    Very Nice!

    This piece had a nice flow, good vocabulary and great imagery interwined together. I enjoyed this piece and also enjoyed reading the comments. This piece definitely should have won something in that contest. I think that was written very well and it was presented in a very nice way as well.

    You notice that I am tall without talking down
    and I see the way your jaw line is set upon tomorrow;
    we measure the fit within the beat

    Those are my favorite lines. I like how colorful and life like this feels when its being read. Very nice.


  • The cliche typo
    July 3
    Edit | Reply

    awwwww this is amazing

    I love it! my favorite line- Eyes see the invitation,
    lips part as portals for passage of
    first words:
    Would you? Shall we?
    Hands reach for touch,

    well ok, thats my favorite stanza but still, it reminds me of when i first started dating my ex boy freind


  • Man of Harlech silver member
    July 3
    Edit | Reply
    "hands reach for touch" suggests a dimension of uncertainty. Perhaps this is what you are referring to. My feeling about love is that it begins tentatively, but I have known some girls who fall in love at the sight of a Curt Cobain tee shirt. So figure.


  • Nangaleema
    July 2

    Edit | Reply
    reading this piece actually conjured that nervous feeling in me that one gets... you know... at the beginning, when everything is uncertain. how did you do that?

    my favorite parts:

    lips part as portals for passage of
    first words:
    Would you? Shall we?

    You notice that I am tall without talking down

    we measure the fit within the beat

    A green light shines
    within the places we haven't tried


    i thought the explanation of love as being a matter of opening or progression of opening was expressive. lovely.


  • zigdaddy silver member
    July 2

    Edit | Reply
    This is very good. This is exactly how I always stepped...hmmph...fell into love. No really, courtship has become a horizontal dance these days...don't know if that was what you were intending to say, but that was my interpretation.


    • Man of Harlech silver member
      July 2
      Edit | Reply
      I managed to avoid mention of vampires and whips. Thanks for your positive comment.


      • Nangaleema
        July 2
        Edit | Reply
        ...but if you wrote a piece like that i would definitely want to read it! hahaha

1 - 9 of 9