Always

You always thought I'd fill your shoes,
Carry the legacy that haunts and taunts
Me - and whatever that's left of it,
Stripped naked of dignity and humanity.

I always thought I could carry you -
Through every errata, typed into the
Booklet of failures that underlines the
Moments that flutter by in your life.

He always used to look up to me,
Look up to you for answers to every
Question that underwrites all those
Experiences that he never had before.

But you always stand there aghast
As if the monster you freed from
The cavern of your Godless Lar was,
Well, you're not responsible then.

I'm always waiting on a whisper while
I sit here silently waiting to be woken
From my monthly slumber that will not
Carry me - and you - through eternity.

The disbelief always written on him
Doesn't betray every word I say, and
You keep screaming for answers, but
All I can say is that it's dark in here.