the only answers you will need

How were you born if not from your mother?

Well you see my mom and dad work for the goverment, as part of a top secret experiment group. So i was actually born from a gorllia and thats why i am so hairy, and my love of bannanas.

Close your eyes and tell me what you see!

Well like i said my parents are part of some top secret millitary experiment group so awhile ago they impanted a super sonic sonar device on the back of my eye lids so while they our shut i can still see when i am going.

If all the churches disappeared where would you spend Sundays?

Well thats easy at the chicago cubs stadium as their masscot. DUH did you not remember the part about im freakishly hairy.

Your first born child has just been born and it has the head of a crocodile, explain!

Damn! My Parents to hell cant they atleast leave my off spring alone those f!@#$ing bastards.

You have just invented a new breakfast food, unlike anything we have seen before... describe it!

Well its made from moon cheese (that i stole from my parents lab) you take a toasted bagel and spread the moon cheese on it then you place a small steak on top with some toasted coconut, then batter it and deep fry it but the kicker is it gets dipped in a honey habenero sauce mmmmmm yummy.

Tell me why you hate me ( remember you are telling a lie.. lay it on me).

Well to start off you have no genetically altered parts on you (what a freak). Second you always smell like Roses and sweet Vanillia YUCK! But the kicker is You gave birth to a kid with Crocodile head now that is weird. You wont stop nagging me to shave. you think my taste of food is disgusting yet you eat Salad. And last night i saw you cheating on me with my brother that was born from a alien from mars. grrrrrr i want a divorce.

Why do you lie? ( again... remember you are telling a lie so be creative)

Lie i do not lie it is all the truth, its not like my family is really a top secret spy and i have to cover for them (crap now that i told you the truth we are all in danger).


You caught your neighbor sleeping with your spouse... what do you do? ( you must lie... lol)

Well i am part animal so i watched them a bit then i had to confront them since my neigbor is my brother. My spouse is such a a a.... Wait what, oh its not my spouse its her twin sister that i have never met or ever herd of before that makes since well ill let you guys be.

If one plus one equals two, why aren't all married couples having twins?

My parents havn't figured out how produced twins yet, but once they do the wrold is in trouble. have you noticed my parents are quite controlling, and disturbing.


Tell me who is the worst poet on Allpoetry and why?

Well that would be ME because i never check my spelling and all my poems make me wanna puke. so there happy now i said it jerk. So we should invite your twin sister over for dinner one night.