Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

cummings and goings

Missing image

fingers crossed in hope
clicking heels for a heart
cold
as ice and
molasses fast


snake promised to meet
here in the grass
now dripping with
rain & faith


come hell or high water
unwavered waits
for
heaven on earth
knock on wood
once again

naked lying
vows
took innocence

wet behind the ears

 

 

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • lacef
    August 16
    Edit | Reply

    wow

    Not a very long poems but it says so much to me. It encourages strong visualization.


  • awannabepoet
    July 21

    Edit | Reply
    Hmm, this is delicious, I love that last stanza but would venture to guess it is of a certain eb and flow to which I shall not enter the details of what lurks in the back of my mind.

    This is a very good poem and you know I will need more from you, so of course I have to add you to my favorites.


  • Eric Marsh
    July 19

    Edit | Reply

    mmm

    this seems a very personal poem.......i feel that you wait for someone who doesn't appear ,but whats this, ,"naked lying vows took innocence wet behind the ears"
    mm am i reading to much here ?

    • Hi Eggsy,

      I used this list of cliches for the challenge:

      Keep your fingers crossed
      -There's no place like home
      -As cold as ice
      -As slow as molasses
      -Blame it on the rain
      -Come hell or high water
      -Heaven on earth
      -Knock on wood
      -Naked as a jaybird
      -Wet behind the ears

      So i took them all and made up a story about a girl who had sex with a guy who promised to return for her another day, but clearly, has left her standing in the rain.


      To explain, "naked lying vows took innocence wet behind the ears":

      She was "wet behind the ears". A cliche which means new, dumb, not hip to the game. he took her innocence when they were (lying) naked, by making false vows (lying) so that she would have sex with him.

  • "cold as ice and molasses fast" that has a nice ring to it. I'm sure this is a confusing read for many people. It is also vivid and well written. Enjoyed the imagery.

  • Very contemporary read. I quite enjoyed it. Thank you for the entry.

  • very hot and amazing

1 - 8 of 8