the congenial reproach
a listless malice
ephemeral killing
in the bedroom
(empty minds cause crashes
and the freeway was dead)
her hands were soldiers
to carry away my resolve
my fervor
my pestilence
her lips were insurgents
praying for my destruction
my enemies
my mother
her hair was on fire
burning away my ascendancy
my religion
my soul
her tears were silent bombs
blowing kisses through thick air
blinding starry eyes
blameless
forever falling
killing us all
Author notes
I wrote this for a contest, but went over the word requirement. Oh well!!! I don't write to win, I write to release. That's golden in my book.
A contest entry
- Enter Your best. by Antebellum.
550 points, ended July 9, 169 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Thanks so much for entering
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Good luck
[if you are placed in the finalists I will leave a better comment] -
love the idea and the title is really good


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mmmm
forgive me if i am wrong about this but i think this is about you mother crying and how it affected you, i kow my mother used to cry to get her own way....maybe i'm wrong but this is a great poem beautiful choice of words and visually how it is written on the page....great stuff..i am sure each reader will bring thier own interpritation to this poem...indeed that indeed what true poetry should be about....slapping us in the face and making us stop and think...i mean who wants to read boring formula poetry....i think they call your style off poetry concrete poetry...i could be wrong cos i am new to this, but anyway i thoroughly enjoyed the read....it gave me pleasure so much that i read it several times, and for a lazy sod like me, that alone is a great achievement in itself.....well done...and remember keep writing, keep chllin, keep groovin and keep cool..many thanks.....eric

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No, it's not about my mother. It does give that impression, but no. It's about a woman on her last leg in a relationship and she scorns beyond hell the man who has pushed her over the edge. Sort of like all my past relationships
Oh well, I guess I'll have to keep trying maybe I'll meet the one, but don't get me wrong, I will never 'need' a woman to 'complete' me. There are too many of them out there to waste time on trying hold on trying to make something work, honestly, I'd rather be high!!!!








It makes for good writing, doesn't it???
Thank you very much for your thoughts. I love making people think, it means I've done my part. I will return the favor.
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