Dear Lowercase,
The thing i wish to vent about is nothing new, nothing a million other teens haven't complained about. You see, i hate my parents. Ok, maybe hate is a tad bit strong, but really my dislike for them is so strong. I know plenty of people will tell you it's my age (I'm about to turn 18) but i really don't think that's it. Let me tell you about them both:
My dad has been my biggest enemy since before i can remember. He's the parent who always said "no" and while most people would say that's why i hate him, the truth is i hate him for how he tormented my mom, brother, and myself. Now when i say tormented, i do not mean physical abuse, for there was only a small amount of that and it was directed mostly towards my mom. What i mean is the fear of going home, not knowing what to expect. The feeling of dread in our stomachs as soon as we turned the corner and saw his truck...even now just thinking about it i shudder. I hate my father for telling me that no man would love me...that i could be nothing but a softball player. I hate him so much for getting mad at me for dumping a guy who only wanted sex. I'm still so mad at him for forgetting my birthday... but the one thing i can never forgive him for is him telling me that all men hit their wives after i caught him shoving my mom into a wall. That was the moment when i figured out that he would never be there for me, no matter what. That was the day i knew if i was ever in an abusive situation i wouldn't have my dad to save me. That was when i started to realize how worthless i was.
My mom has been my best friend my entire life, so i know now your wondering how could she hate her best friend? The reason we were so close is because we protected each other from my dad. And together we worked to protect the love of our lives, my little brother. Now while this sounded like a good plan, it didn't stand a chance. My mom was too weak to protect us from him so i stepped and and took as much of the "blows" as possible. While this made me bitter, i never hated my mom for that. I hated her for waiting till i was 17 to leave and i hated her for telling me year after year that she was leaving him and not actually doing it. But even all of that i can forgive her for. What i can't forgive her for is throwing our friendship away after meeting her first boyfriend, for ditching us at my dads house, knowing the abuse we would have to take, for days, weeks at a time so she could go get high with this new guy. I hate her for trying to "help me" by giving me pot. I hate her for taking my money because she spent all of hers on alcohol for her boyfriend and weed for herself. That was when i figured out i was alone in my life.
So as you can see, i have an ordinary hatred towards and unordinary problem. Thank you so much for letting my vent.
sincerely yours,
Kelsey Ponder
Author notes
oh wow...i didnt mean for it to make life sound so pathetic..haha
A contest entry
- dear lowercase (write me a letter) by lowercase prelude.
600 points, ended July 24, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Dear Kelsey..
The pain I feel as I read your write for the contest, sounds like a pathway I knew so well..
Hon..I thank you for sharing, and being so transparent with your life living in an abusive home, with the Dad you have had.
Angelo's comment is so wise and caring...I am making you a favorite as I want to be your friend as well...
I have lived with fear and abuse for many many years...and a lady told me abusers are so used to abusing it is like them getting up and having their morning coffee...To them it is routine and normal...But for us, including your dear Mom and yourself it never is, nor is it right...Much love and
ers as you are on the road to your healing...
A wonderful write and best of luck in the contest 
penning!
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Dear Kelsey..
The pain I feel as I read your write for the contest, sounds like a pathway I knew so well..
Hon..I thank you for sharing, and being so transparent with your life living in an abusive home, with the Dad you have had.
Angelo's comment is so wise and caring...I am making you a favorite as I want to be your friend as well...
I have lived with fear and abuse for many many years...and a lady told me abusers are so used to abusing it is like them getting up and having their morning coffee...To them it is routine and normal...But for us, including your dear Mom and yourself it never is, nor is it right...Much love anders as you are on the road to your healing... A wonderful write and best of luck in the contest
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Love comes in many forms to some they express it through violence and the way they opress all those that surround them. Let not your sense of selfworth be set by that which you have no control over, for in you there is much hope and much love to be given.
Suffice to know how to reach deep within and share it unconditionally, love all those that you meet and they will love you ten fold, hug those that you hold close and they will hug you tighter, be the best person you can be and the world will sing your praises.
Be the person that you are as a whole, for you are shaped by your will and not by the will of those around you.
I like it, I like it so!
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aww thank you so much
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You are most welcome indeed.
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Dear Kelsey,
First and foremost, you are not worthless. You are beautiful and you have a life that has a purpose. I am sorry to hear that you life has such a rough history to it and that your parents simply don't know how to do their job. You dad needs to know what it means to be a "real man" because clearly he is not one. Only cowards and fools hit women. And your mom sounds really naive and selfish and I'm sorry your best friend turned her back on you that way.
In all of this remember that, even though we don't understand why, everything happens for a reason. So through all of this, my desire for you is to become a strong and better woman than your mother ever was and to be a better parent than your father could ever dream of being. I'm sure there is someone out there who will genuinely love you, if only you let them.
With love,
Chris -
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thank you so much for just letting me vent with this contest! it helped so much
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1st off ur not worthless. ur parents are for even letting you think that. ur fathers a coward for having no real form of commnication other than being an ass and ur mom should have had half a brain to protect her family better. i hope things get better for you and i hope ur ok
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thanks and really while things may not be totally better yet, they will be on day and knowing that is really enough for me
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