Dear Ashley

Dear Ashley,

I don't know where you are right now
or what life is dishing out
or how you're feeling right this instant
we're not even in the same country (I'm in canada)
but I want you to know that I'm thinking about you
wondering how you are
how the depression is treating you
as i sit with my computer on my lap at 10:50 pm Febuary 19, 2009
I want you to know that i will always be your friend
i will be here, no matter how hard things get
I will be here, on the other end of a phone, just listening to your voice or the comfertable silence between us
i'm here for you
I'm not a doctor I don't know anything medical about depression but I can see it stealing your life away, your happiness
and I want to do anything i can to give that happiness back to you. anything i can do.
right now i think that's supporting you about brandon. even though i think he's not very nice to you sometimes, i think he's bringing you happiness for the time being and as your friend i should support you in that. please remember that guys are not perfect, they won't always make you happy. they say stupid things sometimes, okay alot of times. they don't get that you want to be alone but have them text you sweet things when you're pmsing. they aren't always there when you want them to be. sometimes they basically suck. but they're also really great. cute and warm and make you smile. we all should enjoy that. but we also need to be careful. the happy things in live aren't alway reliable. they're great when we have them.
I hope you'll be in D.C. in two weeks for the history trip. I think it will be fun, a good break from the regular schedual of school. If you're not there I'll miss you very much and so will Leia. hopefully thou you'll be there.
and hopefully the doctors can get it right and find the combination or whatever of drugs that will let you live your life without having to constantly fight this depression. I know it will always be there in your life but i wish it could take a backseat and let you LIVE. and have fun in life and find happiness. to hang out with your friends or a boyfriend and not be sad.
Ashley I love you very much. you are a really good friend and i want to continue to be part of your life. I want to be there for you, in the good times and the bad times. just like wedding vows....in sickness and in health. <3

Ashley you are an amazing girl
and you deserve happiness

all my love,
Jacqueline