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Moonlight Song

the river trickles along its path
leaving a trail of light
the rapids unleash their withheld wrath
revealing a ravashing sight

crickets sing a comforting lullaby
while starlight shines on the Earth
the owl lets out a silent sigh
beauty showing its worth

i look into the sky,wondering what its like
thinking about all ive done wrong
im hoping that lightning will strike
just another key in moonlight song.

any ideas for making it better??

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Comments


  • crazy eyes
    July 18
    Edit | Reply
    this is rly good beautiful n a way

  • Eusebius
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    hey, this IS good, very good indeed! Fine rhyme UNforced and pretty good meter as well. I liked this poem a ton, even two tons!!! (my only suggestion would be to try to get the same number of syllables in each line.) Great stuff here!!