When I felt unsinpired, I found pleasure
In consuming sweet treats like a treasure
In the days of my youth,
But alas and forsooth,
Now my tooth aches are way beyond measure.
And I’m terribly intimidated
By those torture tools associated
With the dentistry trade,
And though badly decayed,
I just hate when my mouth’s irrigated.
So today, in a quagmire I'm sinking,
For although many molars are stinking,
I have no deep desire
To rush right out and hire
Some old dentist when I could be drinking.
And I hate being ingratiated,
And then suddenly invalidated,
When I'm shown an x-ray
On the chair where I lay,
And my cavities are indicated.
For the last time I went, I was flailing,
And I fell off the chair while inhaling
Way too much laughing gas,
And was stabbed in the ass,
Got impaled on a pick and was wailing.
I got sick and felt so nauseated,
All the walls in the room fluctuated,
And with mouthfuls of drool,
I felt just like a fool,
Like a king when his crown’s abdicated.
And although I still rue and regret it,
I must try to forgive and forget it,
For that sorrow has past,
And tomorrow at last,
I will have my holes filled, though I dread it.
For I can’t forsake teeth like some others,
But just like my appropriate brothers,
I must do the right thing,
And put up with the sting,
Though I break out in sweat and have druthers.
Author notes
I basically used the whole word bank
In one form or another:
Here is the order and the form
That I used them in:
uninspired, pleasure, treasure, youth,
forsooth, tooth, ache, measure,
intimdated, associated, irrigated,
quagmire, desire, hire,
inspire, ingratiated, invalidated,
indicated, flailing,
inhaling, impaled, nauseated,
fluctuated, abdicated, regret,
forget, sorrow, tomorrow,
teeth, others, appropriate, druthers
What did you think
Comments
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This brought back some memories.
Wow! You transported me back to the summer of 1990 when the U.S. Navy told me that I had to have all four of my wisdom teeth removed. I hated every second of that visit. I made the mistake of taking out the guaze too early on the way back to my ship. My mouth was completely numb, and I was bleeding all over the sidewalk. Some nice girl thought I'd been beaten up until I showed her my paperwork from the dentist. Fantastic visual, David!
Don
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I was surprised at the ridiculous complexity of the rhymes until I noticed this was a word bank contest entry. You had to take a few liberties with the limerick form, but it's still pretty funny
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This is hilarious and so true. Reminds me of my recent sojourn to the Dentist's. The words are used so magically to bring out the best of the plight. Especially, the following two lines -
'I just hate when my mouth’s irrigated'
'Like a king when his crown’s abdicated'
Best of luck in the contest.
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