today is her fifteenth birthday. i’ve always remembered it. i wonder who she is now. maybe she’s someone extraordinary and i should regret no longer being her friend. or maybe she’s the same unreliable and irresponsible little girl she always was.
...
i had never met anyone quite like her. she was my complete opposite: straight, blond hair with a dangerous need for adventure, while i was the shy and timid girl with the brown frizzy hair. she rode dirt bikes and went camping and wanted to be one of the boys. i used to want to be like her. i wanted to be fearless.
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i wonder what she’s doing for her birthday. i remember when her parties meant swimming all day, only stopping for cake. now, she’s probably listening to see if mom and dad and julia are asleep so she can sneak out. she’ll have to brush her teeth and spray perfume to get rid of the smell of cheap beer bought with a fake ID. she’s become the cliché bad girl.
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we would lay on the grass in her backyard and laugh and laugh until we couldn’t breathe and the sun had soaked through all of our skin. sometimes, i miss those days. the days before growing up and boys who will eventually fade away and a kind of hurt that was more than scraping your elbow after falling. eventually i grew up. i learned about responsibility and loyalty and honesty. she never grew up. she never learned about any of those.
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sometimes, i wonder, does she even miss me?
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when i found out my grandfather died, she was the first person i called. i asked her if she could please, please, please just be at the funeral because i needed her.
the funeral was the next day. she never showed up. i think that was the first time someone ever really, truly hurt me.
...
Stephanie, i’m sorry if my actions ever caused you pain. that was never my intention. but i can’t bring myself to regret my choices or feel guilty. i could never count on you. and i deserve better than that. happy birthday.
Author notes
This is about my former best friend. i basically just had to stop being friends with her because i felt like i couldn't trust her and i was the only one who cared. today is her birthday. i haven't talked to her in almost three years. i don't really miss her anymore. i think making the decision to no longer talk to her was one of the best things i ever did, honestly. i felt like i deserved to be treated better than that. i don't regret our friendship, but i don't miss it anymore. Besides i have coloringmysenses, who is the best friend a girl could ask for. 
<3
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Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Awuh - I can't believe I haven't commented on this before.
Especially with your AN and all. <3
I hate when this happens to friends.
It's happened too much to me, but once is enough for too much anyway.
You've got such honesty in this and it's got great flow.
I love this piece -
your writing's come so far!
<3
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it's true.
<3
Aw, thank you so much!
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she’ll have to brush her teeth and spray perfume to get rid of the smell of cheap beer bought with a fake ID. she’s become the cliché bad girl.
Its horrifc when girls turn out like this. My best friend Danyelle? Exactly the same.
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it is.
this girl pretty much became everything she hated and screwed me over in the process.
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gotta love Danielle xD
I've never actually had anyone do that to me, but it's a really interesting idea for a poem. I have a few friends who I don't see much or talk to much anymore and I always remember their birthdays but I doubt they remember mine. Anyways, I wish you didn't think your writing sucks. I don't really get why you do. You're kinda like me in the sense that you write sort of like you talk... well, at least type to me in messages on here.
Sorry for the long rambling comment. I've been leaving a lot of those tonight cause I'm trying to catch up on some comments and I'm like exhausted from being in crammed in the back of a Nissan before AND after being crammed in a meeting. -
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XD
aw, thank you so much!
i love you! <3
haha, it's okay.
ugh that sucks. i'm sorry.
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