dear aanika; girl who writes about the things that my heart bleeds and can’t breathe into words, who forms prophetic poetic perfection and refuses to realize that all the stars she writes about could not compare to the ruby glow she exhumes in every self diminishing, humble declaration she makes.
this is for you to know.
this is for me to share.
this is
me
ran raw.
~
he kissed me when my lips were numb and my mind was hazy with too much bitter tasting fluid that I told myself I’d never touch again. he kissed me and I’d like to say my skin came alive and my heart thundered like a hurricane brewing over stagnant waters, but I’d be lying to you; lying to me. what I felt was the slow and molten feeling of something that would make me sick in the morning. something that would lead to me staring at the ceiling of an unfamiliar room wondering where the night had left my best friend, where forward was from here, and who I was for playing along.
there is such a difference between loving someone and truly loving them,
and I thumbed my nose at that line, told blatant lies to find myself wrapped up in arms that aren’t meant for me. I knew from the beginning that this would happen, that the line would blur and become crossed and, lonely, I tried to grasp for a boy who is beautiful in all the ways I’ve never known.
how can I love him so much but not truly love him?
I put myself in purgatory and am paying the price for selfishness, letting the taste of it salt my vile tongue until I’m nauseous.
and I am nauseous and a nervous tick, the second hand moving closer to the final resting place where the truth pours from my trembling lips; it was a mistake and I’m sorry.
so very, very sorry.
~
love, megan
Author notes
T h e - P h o e n i x
I was listening to Tiny Vessels by Death Cab while writing this.
I needed to write this. It's what's laying heavy on my heart right now.
A contest entry
- write me a letter, yeah. by aanika.
1998 points, ended July 5, 34 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
This is not what I intended...
Comments
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alliteration to the max! i love this. even to the end of this first stanza. "ran raw" makes me think of lungs on the edge of bleeding, beating alongside a worn heart.
bitter tasting fluid?
this piece has become more a rant of poor decision, confusing left in the limbic region of your brain. unsure, but worn enough not to care. just the words that can creep are aloud to leve the mouth.
and i'm surprised something so intricate mirrors this song.
miss this writing.
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WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW
I loved this poem or leter whatever it was it i loved it im almost speachless AWESOME keep it up.
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i'm glad this helped you. this contest is helping me too, more than i ever could have imagined.
i'm learning so much about the people on this site, and learning that they know more about me than i would have thought possible. i can't believe that so many people here think i'm a good poet, or a good person. it honestly blows my mind.
enough about me. the WHOLE second part of this letter was like... my life wrapped up and phrased better than i ever could have put it. i'll talk about that more in the letter that you're probably going to get back from me.
don't ever be sorry for something you once loved.
okay?
<3
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