Infinitesimal
First
we struggled grasped and pushed and pulled to emerge from the endless string that brought us to the hole in eternity from which we have escaped with our baggage composed of infinitesimal bits and pieces from a even more infinitesimal piece of a string of predecessors who each operate an infinitesimally finite apparatus that plays an infinitesimal part in the drama that is who and what we are or aren't as
(Secondly)
the mysterious script unfolds while we chug roll crawl stumble walk run saunter creep hobble limp tug grasp wallow slide and climax through an infinitesimal slit back into the fabric of the infinitesimal reality of an incomprehensible infinity from which we originated and will
(Thirdly)
perhaps vanish or perhaps remain to become a part of the infinitesimal chain that will or will not continue dependent upon future actions and circumstances over which we at best play an infinitesimally decreasing role or roles in the infinitesimally immense and infinitesimal dimensional state of chaos that exists beyond our reason and to which we are imprisoned
(Fourthly)
forever while growing infinitesimally more but less and vise versa
Author notes
A contest entry
- Can you cheer me up? by Forgotten Lilith.
406 points, ended November 7, 90 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - Welcome to the Asylum (in search of AP family of a different kind) by Catacomb.
900 points, ended November 24, 60 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - GROUP CONTEST Chocolate-Eating Peg-Leg Pirates ONLY~~ PREWRITES of any kind that have not won a trophy by Emerald Lass.
700 points, ended November 18, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - This is a lesson in procrastination. by lyrebird.
500 points, ends November 29, 30 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Comments
1 - 26 of 26
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And unusual and intriguing piece.
I very much like the movement of this poem, with the “chug roll crawl stumble” and etc.
Thank you for your entry and best of luck.
♥ -
Thank you for sharing your poetry with me
As I stated before, this is different and I like that
All the very best to you!
~Heavenly~ -
Sorry about last comment
Sorry about very good structure, I didn't finish it off! What i meant to say was:
Very good structure I like how you put it in four parts, and the last part is a conclusion. It reminds me a bit of one of my poems called Execution, but that's only in three parts. Kinda. Anyway, good write, Mr. Bill
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This poem reminds me of a butterfly coming out of its cocoon. So, here goes a butterfly family for you. OHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! Pretty!
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Well done, interesting write...thank you for entering.
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i found this hard to concentrate on because of how it was written but that could also be due to the fact that I am a little tired from a rapid night of being a punky fairy. it was different though and i liked the way it could be connected to the picture you chose to use. a wonderful write i just feel seperated lines would help it flow a bit more.
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Reading this, I felt like I was going mad from the broken flow. I don't know how I feel about it. It was different and reminded me of something one would write after going down the rabbit hole. Thank you for entering my contest. Best wishes.
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I liked it. The abstract approach worked well for you although I have a horrible feeling that you just threw every single 'big' word you knew into the poem instead of being a little more selective with them. I would have like more structure and clarity. But it is an original piece.
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Abstract, unusual and most brillaint. I do find some parts are a little harder to read than others as well as the fact that other parts are absurdly insain! it does fit together a bit like a banoffee pie. Sticky, messy but down right yummy!
your very good at this. Its a funny write too despite not being so outwardly.
Best of luck in the contest,
Dryad Enya -
This was something differnt. I have never read anything like this before it was good. Thanks for entering and best of luck!
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This is very different and creative. I liked what you had to say, it was almost like a tongue twister with all the repetitions of Infinitesimal. Great write, thanks for entering my contest and good luck in all the others!
Blessings,
~Michaela~ -
yesyes
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yes
I didn't care much for the repetition of "infinitesimal" or lack of punctuation, but I love what you were saying with this and where you ended it.
Please wait for the other judge to comment. -
Wow
I think this poem is just amazing. I love how it's all one sentence, that definitely adds something unique. And I adore adore adore adore adore the last line. Good luck in the contests, I hope the judges thing this is as incredible as I do!
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Thanks lofiel for your comment on my poem Infinitesimal -
This is a lead to another poem - Oh Thoughts - of mine that I think will also enjoy and a spend some time pondering through on your own -
http://allpoetry.com/poem/3239956
wishing you many wonderful experiences on the remainder of this and on the thrill of all your future orbits - billpoet
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Oh My~
Thank You for sharing Your Gems of Wisdom: Infinitesimal
~ 
The Only hiccup with this verse is that it was not entered in a *Past* contest of mine to qualify for this particular contest--Sorry
I will have to remove per rules, Nothing personal
I'm Blessed to read Your verse again~
Honored to digest Your Message~
Thankies again for Your time
Many Blessings to You in future contests Sweet Soul
Best wishes & keep that quill dancing
with much love and light~ Desire~*~
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Different; I like that
You obviously are a deep thought person for this piece reflects much thought
Well done
All the very best to you!! -
I really like this poem it is very nice. good job. And Good Luck on the contest.
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This is definitely a poem from a great thinker who has very finite and confident idea of things around.I have read this poem several times and still I'm not very sure that I could reach in it's deepest core.Thanks a lot for entering this poem into my contest"Time".
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very interesting piece... i would prefer maybe a more infinitesimal use of the word infinitesimal.... LOL
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Very abstract.
I thought this was abstract at its best. Your definition of Infinitesimal comes out in all of its glory as I read this. Well written and expressed. Thanks again for letting me read this!
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This is different. The thought behind the poem makes you really think about what it is saying.
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Good
Your work shouts of a subtle wisdom gently distributed throughout your poem. Your insecurity and misgivings about life make themselves apparent in your poem. You paint the scene with descriptive words that bring the essence of your thoughts into our conscious mind and we too can walk in your shoes for a short time and feel what you feel.
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I love the second line in the 'first' bit. It conjures great mental images of struggling out of a dark hole with bags!
I like the fact it is all built on one word - and what a word to build it on ey!
I also enjoy the fact that nothing is certain, that it all seems to be uncertain, that anything can happen.
It makes me feel like, although we're all so small, we're also so big. -
Wow
Very different and I had to read it twice to understand it a little more. Lot of emotion and very thought provoking words. Thank you
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excellent
a deep and very different thinker, I think! I really, really enjoyed this piece! Before I knew it I found myself lost in thoughts I have never even considered before-life, indeed is a mystery we can't begin to understand or perhaps we have moments when we seem to find one more piece of the puzzle that appears to have a lot of lost pieces-just maybe we get a glimpse of brilliance from this poet that seems to comprehend a slice of the incomprehensible.
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