firefly,
i will someday
hold you
in my palms
to feel your
gossamer wings
flutter against
my fingers
and when the pines
are quiet,
i will open my hands
to see your glow fade
like the last
remnants of day
into charcoal night.
A contest entry
- R.I.P by tsukiyo.
400 points, ended June 23, 14 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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This is very pretty and very well written. My favorite part was the last two stanzas and the only thing in the poem that stopped me was the origami wings because I used to do origami and I think of it as thick and solid white rather than thin and translucent. But it's still a great write.
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Thank you for entering. I'm sure Amanda would have been happy to know that you, a perfect stranger, has entered a poetry contest that was dedicated solely for her.
I enjoyed this immensely. The last line made me sad, but not in a bad way, because the rest of the poem gave me so much hope.
I can't really say much about this poem because its lovely just the way it is.
thank you for entering, and good luck.
anneliese -
i like this almost as much as you like mah new face picture
no. seriously. this is pretty great. -
i believe i preferred the previous edit although this still has a good consistency
not sure about origami wings.
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i loves it =D
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