“Hey dude! The name is Raymond!
Call me ‘Rainbow’ if you’d rather,
Yeah, my outside’s made of glass stuff, man,
And inside’s made of lava!
Wow, my innards really groovy,
It’s like, whoa dude, it’s far out!
Kinda mystical and dreamy,
Man, I’m cool without a doubt.
It’s bitchin’ on this table here,
The chicks are just ‘the most’!
There’s a lampess who’s Ikean,
Man, that gal can cook my toast!
Yeah, she flicked my switch just yesterday,
Whoa dude, she turns me on!
We were glowing for it all night long,
‘Til both our bulbs had gone!
I’m a funky sorta daddy-o,
I’ve been here forty years,
But I’m telling you, my friend,
This lava dude has shed some tears,
‘Cause no matter where I’m hangin’
People always misconceive me,
Saying ‘He’s transparent! See straight through!”
It’s gnarly, man, believe me.
What these dudes don’t understand
Is that my childhood wasn’t saintly,
I was heated in a furnace!
They used rocks to hit and shape me!
And though later life’s been neat-o,
Man, it’s mostly blurred and misty,
‘Cause it’s hard to be a lava lamp
Whose been stoned since the sixties.
Author notes
Inspired by....by....er....um.....lamps, i guess.
Written March 19th, 2004
A contest entry
- Bring Something To Life by Appyangel.
300 points, ended March 25, 2004, 3 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 24 of 24
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very nice
i luv it! perfectly done and creative~ quite funny i might add
-mindy- -
This is great.
Nice voice and great imagery. I wish I could write humor poems like this but so far it looks as though I am incapable of it.
Elizabeth-
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Yup, the emphasis is on the wrong word isn't it!
These are for you............................................................................................................................................. .............................................................
Whoa!
Love you very much clever boy!
x x x -
I've worked out how to read the last line, at last....!!!! Hurrah.... I am an idiot...
But then you already knew that... Wow, man, look at all these dots... Can I dedicate this to my lava lamp... it's, like, the best...
Just like you...
xxx -
You give this lamp a lot of personality. The poem brings memories of a time I wasn't quite old enough to experience properly...but I remember those groovy lamps. Enjoyed this a lot!
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AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
HIPPIES RULE and i would so be one if it werent for the fact that im not one. wait that makes no sense what so ever. am so confused with myself. btu this poem so rocks!! ur FUNNY. funnier than ripped up card board boxes. this poem is great, and if i was a lava lamp, i would feel exactly the same. you have the est way with words!! -
I really really like this poem, I would have never of thought to do a poem about a the life of a stoned lava lamp but damn ti was great, thanks for your comment on my poem, great work!!
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nice
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bec, this is absolutely hilarious, and as suggest above i read it out loud and laughed even harder. Now demons are not prone to laughing so no telling or i'll have to eat your soul...lololol. thanks for the comment on my deadtime story and you are right there is a difference between horror and gore. wonderful write and yes i am still laughing.
~Spawn~ -
A tribute to the lava lamp, immiscible liquids lambent, but fashion cycles swirl around so these once more are rampant? Well rise less dense, then shrink and sink expansionist dimension, and maybe from some sad seventies child you’ll lift a little tension…
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Decided to come and have a look at you after your comment to me. I Looove Lava lamps and this is a beauty! So is to poem. Off to look at some more. (your poems that is)
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Bloody great Bec - Dave and I had one of these as a wedding present - it was 'ORANGE!!! ~ i left it in England when we moved to Oz. It's long gone I imagine to the great lava-lamp cemetary. - or it may have been re-cylced and recently sold as brand-new now that they are back on the market.
Very funny write Bec - and thanks for the promo on your author page.
~Von~ -
Hehehe I never even SAW this because my faves list has been being a bitch for a little while, now its being even more turdy and i was scrolling down it and i was like wait a cotton picking minute.... Hum.
but you're funny
and this reminded me of the turtles from finding nemo... heheheheheh
god write You're clever damn you bec damn you to hell!
Jadey xXxXx
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this one was great!!! i loved it! and so did my lil' lava lamp Robyn (I don't if it's a he or a she)
Great writing!!
Peace, Enid. -
the picture has now developed a total personality and i think of it as him so the poem is totally convincing...really great especially with the photo...
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This cracks me up! The idea of a stoned lava lamp! Perhaps its glassy eyed viewers had no idea the effect they were having on the poor guy. I love the language, especially "gnarly".
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This is cute. You were very effective in sounding like an over aged hippie. Cute line about being stoned since the sixties. Good Luck. Hugs, Penny
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Hey man! Great poem daddy-o!
Whooooa!!
Dude!
You rock!
Beck
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HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
OOOOOoooohhhhh Bec. what a fabulous write.
absolutely hilarious. and when read aloud .. makes it even funnier.
I loved this.
As always your humour is brilliant
Ann -
Coooool!
Lava lamps are all the rage here now, and I confess I bought one not long ago for a birthday present (yeah! that's what they wanted!) The shop assistant was going on about them being hip so I told her that we had one at home when I was a kid (much like the one in your pic actually) I swear she didn't believe that there were prehistoric lava lamps LOL!
Just luv the language in this one... good luck!
Kyla -
excellent
Bec I really laughed at this. The subject and 60's hippie style were perfect. A loopy lava lamp ! I will never be able to look at one the same again . lol -
Oh god me too. Am supposed to be working right now! Have been looking at the same piece of paper for half an hour!
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Cheers kim! Thanks for the challenge! Was good fun...(should do something bit more useful now i suppose!! he he!)
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Hee hee! Bloody brillant and the personality is spot on! The challenge is on everybody!
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