My view of Heaven was blurred by dusky clouds,
While urban soldiers marched on in swathes of smoke
Cackling words of profane excitement under masked voices,
And tempting fate with visible expectations of immortality.
It was impossible to find your smile in the nights sky,
While persuasive opinions stamped out the flame,
And twisted the memories of holding love near.
A concrete expression of freedom through rebellion.
But though the dusky clouds hindered my vision,
And devilled words were whispered in my ear,
That little thought of finding you in the sky again,
Moved me to look past the temptations in the way.
So when I took another look to the skies above,
It was clear that the dusk had not masked your face,
But brought it closer that I may hear you sing.
A concrete expression of peace through honour.
Comments
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Love it hun
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Repeat
I go with Kristian, although I should say 'envisage' not 'envision', small point. Writer should either say 'night-sky' or, using poetic licence, 'night's sky'. As it is , it is just wrong, and might as well be polished up.
Through no fault of the writer, I was hopelessy side-tracked by the thought of devilled kidneys!
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i like the first two stanzas ,they are great and i can easily envision them to be sung in some song,like the words just come together so gracefuly,then it becomes tedious in my opinion,anyway..
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Complexity i often pick at but; its good to know, I don't know everything about you; (self-realization), um, anything I say will just get in the way so I'll just give you the points. Grand you know.
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