Processional bells, cheering
through a silver lipped mist.
Like a savior, she smiles,
hiding insecurities behind her wings,
diamonds over cold sand.
Struggle to cradle silt in my palms,
but it is like water - fleeting.
Possessive ambition sparkles,
a shimmering something,
reminiscent of vagabond joy.
This is hope in a painted shell,
but hope so often crumbles.
I know my walls are not so frail.
Who is to say they are surmountable?
Tempting in her warmth,
she draws desire, need, love;
my heart shudders, shackled,
like a bird against it's bars.
Author notes
I wrote this a couple months ago during a rough emotional patch. I'm just now well enough to bother getting on here to update my hand written pieces rather than just my on the moment works. This is only the first edit, there's plenty of room for change and adjustments.
- Bis Lesbians Gays and Transgendered group list • next in list
Criticism, advice?
Comments
-
Wonderful
A very passionate piece that shows your amazing ability with imagery and your talent for penning some very powerful writes. I think the flow here is excellent and your use of metaphors outstanding. Your emotions are shown so prominantly here for all the world to see. Raw, powerful emotion. A wonderful look into the depths of your heart and soul. Keep up the amazing work.
-
it seem incomplete
it left me hanging slightly i mean dont get me wrong its a great write sad but amazing

-
wow this is so full of passiona nd emotion i can tell this piece means alot to you by your words. sometimes it is not what others think of your work but what your work has done for you


