Missing Missy

I have sat here
all these long years
and helplessly watched you deteriorate
right before my eyes.
The more the virus spreads
and the weaker your body grows,
the more my heart aches.

Watching her is like observing a battle field,

a war between her and this disease,

slowly beating her down

down until she has no artillery left

to fight this dreadful battle.
Every morning
and every night
I drop to my knees
begging for a miracle.
I scream at the sky in vain
and hope for justice.
She is the definition of
innocence.
How could I stand to watch her untimely
death?
How could I permit myself to
live
when she can not?
Especially when I don't deserve to
as she lies in her bed sick.
Through the agony
I feebly attempt to stay strong
but when I am alone
locked in the confines of my room
all I can do is weep
for the lost memories
we once shared
and the memories that now
will never occur.
Every ounce of discomfort I observe
shatters my heart again and again.
You are my hero,
my everything.
When I look into your eyes
it is my reflection I see
staring back.
You are who I am.
You are in my heart
and in my soul.
When you die
part of me will also die with you.
But the stronger part of me
will continue to struggle on
because I know you are watching over me.
Because you are me
and I am you.
Still I maintain faith
for I know you will be in God's hands
and there you will be safe
and loved.
I can move on peacefully
with the guarantee
that when I die
you will be there to hug me
and I will also be home.