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My Shadow and Me

... 

 

 

 

My eyes

must have nearly been black, because

the delusions continue chattering,

incessantly...

 

Ignoring the noise, I began to sing,
and dance between staggers.
Smiling at my shadow,
recalling Peter Pan

and Never land,

 

my hand
paused in mid-wave...

Inside its faceless salutation,
was a discovery ~ much too reflective,
So I turned away,

 

ending my night

with a hello,

 

to the moon that wobbled.

 

 

 

...

 

 

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • Daizee silver member
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    The Peter Pan reference was a sweet touch.It was a childhood favorite. The final sentence was hug around the heart

  • Judith Chandler
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    That brings back some memories! Not recent ones.

    "the moon that wobbled" I'm not sure I ever noticed that but I do remember the ceiling that revolved.

    A vivid, enjoyable write.


  • penman gold member
    June 18
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Such a great write. So very descriptive. Best of luck in the contest.


  • Matt E. Smith gold member
    June 17

    Edit | Reply
    great poem..has your own original style but you definitely added an edge. i liked this...and the ending was perfect imagery


  • whitecoffee
    June 17
    Edit | Reply
    Love this, especially the end. The whole thing has an elegance to it...


  • Pure Thought silver member
    June 17
    Edit | Reply
    Tinker, tinker... looks well tinkered to me.


  • Cannonsfire
    June 16

    Edit | Reply
    I love that ending, it's original and fresh and works well to give that zing at the end.Good luck C


  • thepoetssoul
    June 16

    Edit | Reply
    This is brilliant work, i hope this poem does well.
    It really is so good, and the images are delightful.
    A great big smile from me
    Thanks for sharing.

    Tony


  • JinSays gold member
    June 16

    Edit | Reply
    ahhhhh, moons that wobble, damn-dont you hate that?
    Naw love, I do like it alot. Sometimes my moon sings to me too. Sometimes I think it's winking at me and calling me lover. . .who am I to argue with something like that?
    Then I realize my glass is empty, and I have to tell the moon goodnight.
    Love it my friend, thank you.
    Jin


  • Idle Mind Wondering silver member
    June 16

    Edit | Reply
    I love the self enduring quality of this piece.

    "Inside its faceless salutation,
    was a discovery ~ much too reflective,
    So I turned away,"

    This line absolute perfection.

  • Angelshadow
    June 16
    Edit | Reply
    Wow nice poem


  • pineapple-eyes
    June 16
    Edit | Reply
    Not good on commenting on people writing but just to say I really liked.

1 - 12 of 12