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It Could Be Worse

I should have known kissing a lemon
only shivers for a time, and isn’t the same
without tequila.

My king sized bed represents
so much wasted breath~

~lashes bow,
but in the way...

… my body’s sway
lays naked,  untouched
and breathing.

Water seeks my eyes while
stretching to close up
the vastness...

sidetracked for a moment
by a moth
trying to commit suicide,

anxiety defeated, I smile
and turn out the light.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • Poetic Tasha Moderators member
    September 6

    Edit | Reply
    wow, this is so sad and yet lovely
    brilliantly penned as always hun,
    your work is never anything less than stunning.

    Tasha


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    August 13

    Edit | Reply
    Another stunner. You always capture so much feeling and atmosphere in your writes hun!


  • Exodus gold member
    July 13

    Edit | Reply
    How interesting is it that I don't think this piece would have the same emphasis if it wasn't in italics. It's the little things that make a poem, and you certainly know that. Beautiful.

    Thank you
    F

  • Bob Fox silver member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply

    My

    What a visual poet. Te unique loneliness and oh the Moth, just perfecto. Perhaps one of your finest writes yet. But one day the bed will become deliciously smaller.


  • Desire gold member
    July 9

    Edit | Reply

    Oh My~

    This is one Powerful piece and my fingers just got a cramp from its Intensity
    Holy Canole~ the first line gets the body juiced up for the finale~
    Excellent~ this swells the eyes with emotions Bravo!!
    Love Your Mind~ can I borrow it
    You go on Hot Momma
    Last two lines~ Kung Powwwwwwww
    Thank You for sharing Your Voice
    Best wishes in the contest
    with love & light~ Desire~*~


  • j i n gold member
    July 7

    Edit | Reply
    defeated. hmmm,

    My king sized bed represents
    so much wasted breath~
    ~lashes bow,
    but in the way...

    … my body’s sway
    lays naked, untouched
    and breathing.

    this is absolutely wonderful. The prose contest is bringing out that lovely, delectable narrative voice. Yummy.
    You're beautiful Delila.
    Love,
    jin


  • Rend the Veil gold member
    June 28

    Edit | Reply
    this is a wonderful write, filled with sensual sadness, I loved this part!! superb !!

    sidetracked for a moment
    by a moth
    trying to commit suicide,

    anxiety defeted, I smile
    and turn out the light.

    Blessings

    Rend


  • February Moon gold member
    June 28
    Edit | Reply
    Really well written.


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    June 26

    Edit | Reply
    Damn that's a good expression.

    I like the bit about the moth.

    Just like the title says it could always be worse.

    Much love,
    Mark


  • Soft-Rain
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    I adored this poem and can relate to what you have written so amazingly.
    I loved this line the best maybe cause i know ..i know..

    My king sized bed represents
    so much wasted breath~

    Great writing my dear of course i always loved your talent,
    ~Lisa~


  • Dalaney gold member
    June 25

    Edit | Reply

    I've spent the last five minutes or so just looking at your homepage (I love it, especially the pic's of your boys) and now to read your poem is like the icing on the cake.  I love, "sidetracked for a moment by a moth trying to commit suicide..." I know...I know...I always pick out the most 'off the wall' lines in the poems I read, but this is what makes them memorable, and you certainly are a memorable writer

     

    Love, Lane

1 - 11 of 11