Time ceased for the sound,
an unrelenting rip.
Shortly beyond that moment,
eyelids became wings
stressing... attempts to escape
this unforgiving anchor.
Reminiscent roots, swell to trip~
my roses so angry,
and overgrown.
I pause-
a listless puddle evaporating.
Author notes
Prompt is this picture:
Raw Emotion by `larafairie
http://larafairie.deviantart.com/art/Raw-Emotion-49830704
A contest entry
- Emotional Women/Non Sequitur Quickie by white stone.
700 points, ended June 11, 5 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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reminiscent....
love that word always gives a write such a lovely feeling....
also loving the closing line, emotionally felt piece, brilliantly penned as always
Tasha


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Excellent
What a great write. And so very well expressed. Congrats on the bronze.

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Wow... look where you have come, from when you started here. You never seemed to feel you were good enough... you always were, but this is new level.
Impressive.

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I think you write your frustration here, those thorns that block a path, where you can see the flowers in the beyond but can't quite reach them. It's emotional and raw.
C


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that's raw indeed, that first couplet worked well. what a closer too. A good way to describe the erasure. thank for the take.


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holy cow that is one hell of a closing line...
very visual, I had to sit here for a moment and allow the picture to develop in my mind slowly
You really outdid yourself with this write dear and I am sure you are going to be considered for a finalist
this makes my write look like grade school crap... what the heck was I thinking? ( that's a backwards compliment by the way... lol) I really need to follow you around a bit and learn from you, perhaps you will inspire me to dig a bit deeper and then maybe I can at least advance to middle school... lmbo
awsome write hun... good luck in the contest!

1 - 6 of 6






