dear boy,
-
i know we've strolled through imaginary black forests and
stumbled upon old memories throughout the year, but i
just thought i'd let you know that though you've fractured
my halo that once represented my innocence, i'm still
on the brink of falling for you. and i know my sobriety is
abused from crashing against the marble floor and indenting
your stability, but if i could, i'd rewind my mistakes and
rewrite them in pencil.
-
but you carelessly tossed me a black permanent marker and
told me to scribble each individual thought onto crisp-thin
paper. thinking you were sophisticated enough to control
the sensitivity of my fingers, i foolishly registered the past
in ink. now, i've never felt so lost.
---
dear girl,
-
i would never intentionally pull the rug out from beneath
you. my heart is swollen with infliction from rejection, and
i feel as if i could collapse if i take another breath. i know
you would give me wings if i let you lean closer into my
atmosphere, but i'm afraid you may poison it with your kindness.
-
i wish you understood how much i want to love you.
-
but
i'm so used to playing the part of the puppet and being turned
away from the world, being dawned in the shadows of misery
and contemplating on downing vodka to the point where my
imperfections aren't visible when i face myself in the mirror. but
i have you to thank for patiently consuming my thoughts, even
though it slowly eats away at your ribcage and leaves you wondering
why i can't see your beauty, your acceptance, your will to love
me when no one else will.
---
dear boy,
-
please don't rain on my parade with apologies.
all i've ever wanted from you was the truth;
even if it destroys me in the end.
---
dear girl,
-
you deserve better than a tattered umbrella to protect
you during a rainstorm. don'tletyourselffallformeagain.
-
because i don't want to hurt you anymore.
Author notes
i n n o c e n c e j a d e d . x x
name; amanda.
picture number 4; you're way too good for me.
kind of somewhat personal.
A contest entry
- Let Me Haunt, Let Me be Your Ghost by she still smiles x.
2400 points, ended June 29, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Five PW, One Fresh. by dieu..
800 points, ended June 19, 51 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - the coruscate rounds. auditions <3 by dieu..
700 points, ended June 21, 62 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
[please] don't try so hard to say goodbye;
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
-
you
are
genius.
that's all i can say.
-
wow.. just wow.. brilliant, amazing, great... words can't describe how much I really loved this write.
"please don't rain on my parade with apologies.
all i've ever wanted from you was the truth;
even if it destroys me in the end."
Great Job!<333
-
wow, i absolutely loveeeed this poem, especially the amazzzzing imagery and emotion. most letters are written in prose and this seems to be in an intelligent freeverse form. i also like the story you tell throughout this poem. good job!
: -
'i know we've strolled through imaginary black forests and
stumbled upon old memories throughout the year, but i
just thought i'd let you know that though you've fractured
my halo that once represented my innocence, i'm still
on the brink of falling for you. and i know my sobriety is
abused from crashing against the marble floor and indenting
your stability, but if i could, i'd rewind my mistakes and
rewrite them in pencil. '
i wanted to just pick my favourite parts from that but i couldn't, the whole first stanza is just amazing.
i love the halo reference, and the brink of falling, and the marble floor and rewriting in pencil.
just wow, makes me want to cry.
'you deserve better than a tattered umbrella to protect
you during a rainstorm. don'tletyourselffallformeagain.'
so so sad.
i think that the letters to the boy are much stronger and heartwrenching, but the dear girl are just as amazing.
you're brilliant love.
♥
-
So so so so beautiful!!!!
-
yeees
-
Yes love
-
yesyesyes
-
great job liked it a lot
-
Awesome poem, I can relate to all of this, nice job
-
ooh okay, with the first stanza i think the line about fracturiing haloes is a little too awkward and full. maybe think of breaking it up.
but if i could, i'd rewind my mistakes and
rewrite them in pencil.
-damn, great line.
you deserve better than a tattered umbrella to protect
you during a rainstorm.
-i lovelovelovelove this a billion times and more. tis fantasitisc
-
Holyyyfuckkk.
THIS HAS GOT TO BE ONE OF THE MOST AMAZING THINGS I HAVE EVER EVER EVER READ OF YOURS. You did an incredible job of using the pic as inspiration and pulling an emotional overload from it. Gahhh, how can I even pick favorites love?!
"i know
you would give me wings if i let you lean closer into my
atmosphere, but i'm afraid you may poison it with your kindness."Oh, wowww. That's just flatout fucking beautiful. I love the contrast of 'poison' against 'kindness'. Hahhh,
, you're amazing =D"i have you to thank for patiently consuming my thoughts, even
though it slowly eats away at your ribcage and leaves you wondering
why i can't see your beauty, your acceptance, your will to love
me when no one else will."Awww, what gorgeous lines. I loveloveLOVE how you wrote it from your point of view and then his! Ahhhh, it brought out the intensity of your feelings and whatnot.
dear boy,
please don't rain on my parade with apologies.
all i've ever wanted from you was the truth;
even if it destroys me in the end.
dear girl,
you deserve better than a tattered umbrella to protect
you during a rainstorm. don'tletyourselffallformeagain.
because i don't want to hurt you anymore.-- *tries not to cry*
you are my hero.
i had to stop myself from commenting this entire piece.
i'm book marking this.
=D
iloveyou.
-
ChI~ChI..
WoW, ThIs Is HoT. I LiKe..
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