night-embraced savannah rolls infinite outward on all sides
as if chunks of neutron star fallen to earth
as if shadows compressed into massive matter
boulders pile one atop the next amongst sleeping trees
seeking solace in their own company
a furtive leaf-rustle-pebble-tumble tickles the restive ear alert
and the eye darts to the nearest largest pile
just in time to view the ululant purling of
ten thousand fluid zibeths
flowing urgently to earth.
A contest entry
- Pick a word - Write a poem in 10 LINES or Less (Z) by The Fun House.
1050 points, ended June 13, 31 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Now this, I can really since my teeth into and my soul. The imager is rich, like a intricate puzzle that builds itself around you; willing you to understand. That is captivating and keeps your attention. Excellent.
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rolls infinite
-i have no idea what it is about those two words put together that just completely draws me into this poem.
a furtive leaf-rustle-pebble-tumble tickles the restive ear alert
and the eye darts to the nearest largest pile
-the imagery in those lines is dead right. you've conveyed that part perfectly and i think it is because of the way you've used 'eyes dart' and 'furtive'. great word choices
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