I could see you were desperate to change. you struggled against boiling point but could never turn into steam, just solidified clouds. I turned the dial higher and all you did was burn.
.
I wanted to stop the moss stealing your irises, but every time I got an inch closer to tearing the ivy from your limbs, you just sunk deeper into an impenetrable mist. I don’t know what it was about you that urged me to break just so you could see we all were teetering on the edge. maybe it was the way you toyed with the sun then tossed it aside as if it wasn’t even important. maybe it was the silence buzzing on your tongue, or the cracks aligning themselves into a perfect portrait of defeat on your ribs.
maybe it was the way I saw fragments of myself stuck under your mirror.
.
you seemed so ardent to find the right words that I sat patiently, waiting for them to stumble haphazardly from the roof of your mouth. finally you spoke and the skies turned lilac with passion. I had never seen you so rejuvenated, so alive.
‘do you think I could be the first person to call the moon his own? do you?’
I thought that cocktails mixed at 3am and cliffs did not often result in tomorrow’s best intentions. I thought that the stars could so easily fit into my veins that maybe one day I would squeeze their dust from them and breathe their shine. I thought the world could tip over and I still wouldn’t have the heart to tell you that the moon has already been invaded. I thought I could fix you.
‘I think anything could happen’
.
you died trying to climb up cyclones in order to get to space.
Author notes
prompt:
you're like something beautiful tangled up in something ugly just like a red rose stuck in a thorn patch or stars lost in the darkness or-- youwrappedupinme.
-my.stars.dont.shine
c a n d y m o r p h i n e
A contest entry
- in need of something stunning. by my.stars.dont.shine.
900 points, ended June 22, 16 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - preliminary round; i wear a halo when you look at me. by innocence jaded.xx.
900 points, ended June 20, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
if i was improper grammer, would you have the heart to correct me?
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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A candy box full of tasty imagery, flowing upon a stream of dark silky chocolate. This really took my breath away...
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I could see you were desperate to change. you struggled against boiling point but could never turn into steam, just solidified clouds. I turned the dial higher and all you did was burn.
.
I wanted to stop the moss stealing your irises, but every time I got an inch closer to tearing the ivy from your limbs, you just sunk deeper into an impenetrable mist. I don’t know what it was about you that urged me to break just so you could see we all were teetering on the edge. maybe it was the way you toyed with the sun then tossed it aside as if it wasn’t even important. maybe it was the silence buzzing on your tongue, or the cracks aligning themselves into a perfect portrait of defeat on your ribs.
You have the coolest beginnings ever!
♥
B
P.s. Hecameback -
yesss.
This is beautiful. I absolutely love it and adore it. (:
You knew that already. baha
Thank youu for entering love♥ -
I thought that the stars could so easily fit into my veins that maybe one day I would squeeze their dust from them and breathe their shine. I thought the world could tip over and I still wouldn’t have the heart to tell you that the moon has already been invaded. I thought I could fix you.
- AHHHHH! Those are, without a doubt, some of the most astounding lines of poetry I've ever read. Freakin' gorgeous, I tell you!
AMAZING! <3
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'I could see you were desperate to change. you struggled against boiling point but could never turn into steam, just solidified clouds. I turned the dial higher and all you did was burn.'
amazing.
'I wanted to stop the moss stealing your irises, but every time I got an inch closer to tearing the ivy from your limbs, you just sunk deeper into an impenetrable mist.'
i love that imagery, all beautiful and mossy
do you recently like the word ardent?
'I thought that the stars could so easily fit into my veins that maybe one day I would squeeze their dust from them and breathe their shine. I thought the world could tip over and I still wouldn’t have the heart to tell you that the moon has already been invaded. I thought I could fix you.'
favourite part.
'you died trying to climb up cyclones in order to get to space'
that just steals my breath.
you are amazing.
i'm sorry i've not commented in a while, i've been really out of it on anti depressants and other medication to make me cope with normal everyday aspects of life.
♥
♥
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pfft, oh mygosh, don't even begin to apologise.
(but write some more poems as your pounishment xD)
--you feeling okay? -
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i have nothing to write about except my depressing sad life that i can't cope with
i'll survive
i'll write some more tonight, i'm feeling okie, just a little out of it the whole time whilst they discover other illnesses for me to have
how've you been?
♥
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maybe it was the silence buzzing on your tongue, or the cracks aligning themselves into a perfect portrait of defeat on your ribs.
i love this- so so so much
thought that the stars could so easily fit into my veins that maybe one day I would squeeze their dust from them and breathe their shine. I thought the world could tip over and I still wouldn’t have the heart to tell you that the moon has already been invaded. I thought I could fix you.
omgomgomg!
This is beautiful and stunning! I think i entered this contest- no way I'm going to have a chance with you in it... this s so amazing though
Writingfree -
this is something stunning, for sure.
i really like the first stanza. this is beautiful but sad and filled with emotion. love it. thanks for entering.
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