Being without you,
Is like living without a heart,
Like living without hope,
Living with pain and sorrow.
Being without you,
Is like standing on glass,
Like living without air,
Living with no conscious.
Being without you,
Is like walking with no feet,
Like seeing with no eyes,
I can't deal with it.
Being without you,
Makes the clock tick slower,
Makes me want to scream.
Being without you,
Makes me wonder who I am,
Wonder where I've gone,
What you've done with me.
Being without you,
Drives the mind crazy,
Drives the heart into shock.
Being without you,
Is like being without me.
Author notes
CupidsDartboard
A contest entry
- If your life was a movie, what would be the soundtrack? by Tqop.
700 points, ended June 22, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Aegis of Heimdel Auditions by adsaige.
530 points, ended July 17, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - He/She Is So Special...(Tributes and Dedications) by voodoo ink.
1825 points, ended September 6, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - round one - comfort zone by Shadow Anonymised.
400 points, ended September 24, 42 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Emotions!! Everything goes! Almost ;) by MusicMattnessLives.
400 points, ended October 21, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make Me Cry by Scene Queen----.
400 points, ended November 7, 62 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - After That I Was Never The Same by Budart.
1500 points, ended October 14, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make Me Happy On My Birthday? :D by Jaffa-.
480 points, ended October 13, 10 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrites contest!!!!!!!!!!!! enter!!!!! by foreveryourslove.
1120 points, ended November 9, 1064 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - Anything and everything :) by Thewordflow.
415 points, ended November 15, 68 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Heartbroken by WideEyedSuicide.
400 points, ended November 8, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark & Depressing Writes! Please enter! by Sheilasbabygal4life.
400 points, ended October 17, 116 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Wheres My Guardian Angel Gone? xxx by Scarlet x Stone.
650 points, ended October 19, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - What affects you? by DontObjectifyMe.
700 points, ended October 20, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PREWRITES!! Emotion please!! by Graciee.
550 points, ended November 24, 206 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
-
Wow this is amazing, I love this and can relate so well!!! Its simply put but i thinm that makes it even more effective. It flows nicely and the last verse really brings it to a nice end with a strong statement that so many people will be able to relate to.
Good luck
xoxoxox
-
Hey, this is a great and powerful write. Your words are strong and imagery good. I can sense all sorts of emotions in this piece, i really like it xxx Thank you xxx
-
This was good. I really enjoyed it! Had a amazing flow too it. I liked it. Thanks for entering and best of luck too you in the contest. Keep up the good work!
-
What we all have to admit we feel from time to time...I kept seeing in the repetition as if it is confession, if this makes sense of what I am saying, you know you feel this way while seeking and searching...the ending is profound. Excellent. Blessings.
-
thanks!
-
I loved it. It was an excellent write, you did a very good job. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck!
-
WOW! theres some lovely raw emotion in this one
Shame about the amount of contest entries as I am trying to make a new writer noticed :/ Ahh well,,
Good luck and thankyou for entering
(sorry about the short comment but ive got 105 of these to do :L) -
thank you
-
A very well written and interesting piece that i thoroughly enjoyed.
Great show of emotion with a nice flow.
Reminds me of the song with or without you.
Thanks for sharing and good luck in the other contests, i know you'll do well with this one xx
-
I like reading poems by young authors because they are so raw, so absolute, and so emotional. Reminds me of my own youth. This poem has all that and a lot of momentum as well. Rolls right along. The only part I would change is line 12. sounds valley girl and breaks the drama of the piece for me. Truth is you are dealing with it by writing this poem.
On a personnel note don't worry after a week or two you will feel better. Trust me another true love will be along directly
-
(:
-
WOW! :
-
thank you!
-
Awe. This is sweet. Love, pain, there are so many emotions here. I love this. I really do. I can relate as well. Awesome. Really all I can say. Great write and Good luck.
Matt -
this is really pretty. i can see the pain dripping through the lines, but i'm not keen on the repetition. can you possibly think of other ways to say the same thing? just a thought.
-
This isn't exactly what I was looking for..I was looking for positive poems, though I feel your pain in this poem. You penned your emotions well in this! Good luck in the contest.
Blessed Be,
Jeremy
-
i've been leaning on the fence with this write... not that it really matters how i vote, since the other judges have all given you each a yes. i was not a fan of the repetition; you had some good ideas, but you never really expanded them because you seemed dead-set on repeating the same phrases ad nauseam. i don't know your other poems and i don't know who you are, but i'll give you the benefit of the doubt:
yes -
Yes. It's a good write, but it could use some work. Thank you for entering.
-
thank you
-
-
to reply, hit the little 'reply' button under my username.
-
-
Yes.
I am going to say this was overall a rather generic write BUT there is potential in it. -
thank you (:
-
I believe with the right guidance, you could really surprise us later on in these rounds, so for now, you are receiving a Yes from me.
-
thank you!!!!!!!! im thinking about publishing
-
OMG:
OMG you rock! Dude you so totally rock. That was so awesome. I loved that. This reminds me of a song I wrote a while back. To be honest, when I read the last two lines it shocked me at how you ended it. It was a perfect ending. It took my breath away. I understand the poem because I'm in love and that's how I feel about my boyfriend. Wow, you have serious talent. You should publish. Think about it, please! I would love to buy your book. Do you know why? It's because you're soooo awesome. And you like totally rock!
Evemauy
-
thanks
i like this one.
and i love you too jake (: -
Great Mel
i love it and u
b u t ful
-
Very good
Adding your comment:
1 - 28 of 28
