Bronze sports cars with black louvers,
sleek,and masculine. Pride on wheels.
Until those tiny fingers wrap round,
and a baby your heart steals.
Now your driving an old pick up,
with two car-seats in the back.
Your watching ballet lessons,
and a midget linebacker attack.
Your wallet never contains money,
but bulges with school pictures.
Friday nights are family focused,
and movie ratings are now stricter.
New school shoes changing
from sneakers to high heels.
Soon your son is helping you
make Internet real estate deals.
Looking in the mirror you see,
a silver haired stranger looking back.
But, you don't have time to wonder,
the grand-kids arrive with backpacks
Happily exhausted, you collapse.
Laughing as they all leave.
Little walking trophies-
look at all you have achieved!
A contest entry
- Fathers & Grandfathers too! June Bandit only contest by The Poetic Bandits.
900 points, ended June 20, 11 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
-
Good imagery used in this descriptive write. The rhyme was good (although you used back/attack combination twice in this poem). Very nice word portrait of you father.
Thanks for entering this contest.
Dennis
-
-
Thank you very much
-
Thank you Dennis
-
-
I liked this one. Nice read nice flow and an enjoyable story, good job and good luck
-
I like the theme, the build-up, and the ending line. The "And a baby your heart steals" line is kind of awkward, but I see that it's necessary for the rhyme scheme. I'd recommend changing the word "ole" to "old," since the informality of it doesn't really match the rest of the poem.
-
-
Thank you for the assistance!
-
Adding your comment:
1 - 6 of 6
