A growing distance

All that I know around me
isn't what it was.
There are those that try to find me
but I seem to shut out their love.

I now look back on what was there
and wondered if I let this happen...
School became the center
and a boy soon followed after.

It's true, we've drifted apart some
I don't deny that fact.
I think it's partly shame for me
that I don't know how to act.

Was this change always meant to be?
Or did I just sit back and let it
using a boyfriend as an excuse
to help me move on, forget it?

I feel I let most people down
I don't hold up my deal-ends
but what about you? you seem just fine
though we hardly talk about things.

I got to town last summer
riding the heat wave on a sunset
but I didn't feel like I fit in
you seem to have your life set.

So now I sit to think about
how life swiftly tilts its axis.
I don't know if this is permanent or
solved with just a quick-fix.