Trapped alone in the empty confines
of this coffin shaped room,
my screams bounce off
those empty walls.
My sanity slowly slips away,
until nothing but
the fear of abandonment consumes me.
Like a mad woman clawing her way out of a shallow grave,
I depart this world with nothing left behind
but those dusty old skull and bones.
Yet I became the very thing I was afraid of.
I became
another Victim of Madness!
Author notes
I don't kno how to post pics so here's the prompt I used:
"SAD STORY" by JT @ deviantArt
Good Luck Judgin & hope my poem made sense 
75 words used if I counted correctly.
A contest entry
- Overnight Quickie =] by perfectsunset.
625 points, ended June 1, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-Writes under 15 Lines That Have Won a Trophy! by Leance.
400 points, ended July 14, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments welcome!
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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Well written and expressed. I would love to see the photo this was inspired by.
Favorite stanza:
Trapped alone in the empty confines
of this coffin shaped room,
my screams bounce off
those empty walls.
I got goosebumps just thinking about a coffin shaped room.
Thanks so much for entering and I wish you well in the contest.
Leance L
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An awesome and powerful piece you have created. Love the ending line. Congratulations on gold. Good work.
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You have quite a talent here, and apart from the end where you have thrown away the effect with ~!~ it is in general and perforamce to be proud of.
'Like a mad woman clawing her way out of a shallow grave,'
This chilling line is quite stunning and the simile is one i would not have ever thought to use yet you have exicuted the poem wonderfully.
Best of luck in your writing,
Aussie. -
Brilliaaaant
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Another good one here. Not as dark as the last one I read but no less poignant. You definitely make a person sit back and think when you write. My favorite part had to be these three lines
Like a mad woman clawing her way out of a shallow grave,
I depart this world with nothing left behind
but those dusty old skull and bones.
Such a simple truth stated so vividly. Great descriptive quality in this piece. Great job. -
Superb
'tis another fine write, my friend. You have expressed your thoughts quite clearly. Thanks for sharing this one with us. -
I really liked the dark to this. Your imagery was great and i liked how you incorporated the darkness with your imagery. Thanks for entering and good luck in the contest.
Josh
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WOW!!!
i wish i was a victim to madness
thus nothing i do would be taken seriously!
oh love the flow and the imagery in this write, the way you portray the grave is excellent...
as always a great write what more can i say
Fouzia,
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I think you have a very strong point in the ending there. The power of your words and your raw emotion was excellent....I can relate to you. I have a fear of going insane that grows everyday!! Nice write, congrats on the Gold!
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Nearly forgot da clappies...
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Awesome...
Loving the darkness here, you wield it well...
Great imagery & use of metaphor to describe that madness I can very much relate too...
Keep up the good work...
Well done!!! -
Really great write...I think I have visited that place before...LOL...thanks for sharing
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great piece thanks a million for sharing
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Perfecto Bro!!!
A great write given the prompt here, you really went with it! Thanks for sharing, and wow it's been awhile since I've commented, my bad, great poem though bro as always.
Peace, Tim
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And you're surprised you won gold?! What's wrong with you!? This is amazing!
Congratulations on the gold!
Abi
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wow great write
i could actually picture myself in that mind u i do go insane as it is sometimes but thats different good write and congrats i<3 you always paul
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ooo. and you got gold. so kool. you write some good scawy poems. but i like em. good write.
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Wow, excellent write, Paul. I'm not sure what to say that I haven't said about all your others. But I too feel a victim of madness.
Take care, Paul.
And good luck on the contest -
Wow, this was very well
penned and creative! I
really like the dark edge to
it throughout, and the idea
of a "victim of madness."
You really painted an in-depth
picture, even better than the
original.
Excelllent job with this prompt!
Best of luck & thanks for entering
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Well said, a dramatic poem written from the dark side.
Poems about graves are among my favorites. 
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lol I think we all reside within the confines of our own madness whether we know it or not
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Nicely written here Bro.
Good luck
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