Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

It's all your fault!

All through my life you treated me like shit
called me a fat whore
told me I wouldn't amount to nothing
acted like I had no feelings
like it didn't matter if I got hurt.

Well it isn't like that anymore.
I do have feelings
and it does matter if I'm hurt.
that's just something you need
to get through your thick ignorant skull.

Your not cool!
your not going to make more friends
by treating the ones you have like shit.
By making others feel
like they are worthless.
Like they have no reason
being on this earth.

Have you ever stopped to see
how much your words hurt?
Have you ever stopped to wonder
where all the scars came from?
Have you ever even considered
that maybe it was all because of you?

Well maybe you should have payed more attention.
stopped and thought about the consequences of your actions.
If it wasn't for you I wouldn't be depressed.
I wouldn't have to see counselors.
I wouldn't have to try so hard
to hide the scars.
I would be happy.
I would be somewhat normal.
I would truly be alive
instead of just going through
the motions of life.

It's all your fault!
It's all because you couldn't
stop and consider your actions.
Because you had to feel better about yourself
by treating others like shit.
It's all your fault!
What do you have to say about yourself now?

Author notes

R o s e R e d 9 2 : i want to be in your ap family because i enjoy making new friends. i feel i would be able to help you out and be a real asset to your ap family. thats all i can think of right now but if you have any questions just ask.

A contest entry

if anyone has an idea for a title please let me know.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 15 of 15

  • Leanna-bean
    August 23
    Edit | Reply
    This is pretty good. Thank you so very much for taking the time to enter my contest and good luck to you!!!


  • dutch2lips gold member
    July 25
    Edit | Reply
    thank you for entering


  • aeolia
    July 15
    Edit | Reply

    no.

    i'm a judge now, so...

    my vote is going to have to be no. as others have said, your piece is general when you could have added some imagery, metaphor, and other poetic devices to show us your pain. you could also work on your phrasing and grammar, too.

  • A lot of emotion went into this one and I'm so very sorry for your pain
    A lot of times, others just don't realize how they hurt us and tear us down with their actions and words
    Thank you for sharing your thoughts in this contest


  • aeolia
    June 16
    Edit | Reply
    YOUR: a possessive (your book is over there) YOU'RE: contracted form of "you are" (you're welcome) You wrote "your not cool" and "your not going..."; both should be "you're," since you mean "you ARE not cool" and "you ARE not going," respectively. Also, "you should have payed attention" should be "paid attention." -endymion

  • I have to agree with Amanda below. I also do think that if it were shorter, it'd create more of an impact. My vote is no. Sorry dearie.


  • adsaige
    June 16

    Edit | Reply

    No.

    This poem seemed too general to me; granted you did have some parts that were well worded, your grammar needs words as do your diction. Thank you, however, for your consideration. Also, the background was to be monochromatic with readable fonts.

  • No.

    I like how you portrayed yourself, but there are many spelling errors and the font is hard to read. I also think there could have been more emotion to it. Though I can relate to a lot of it.


    Thank you for entering. (:

  • oh wow this is amazing. so sad. good luck.

  • Please read over the rules again, but i really like this. =] Nicely done, nice emotion. Raw. I like.

  • I loved the strong and raw emotion you poured out into this poem. I think you did a excellent job at showing your true feelings and revealing the harsh words of someone who doesn't deserve the life they have. I hope that whoever has said this to you, or even made you feel this way, they truly will be repaid what they are owed.

    Great job again.


  • loche
    May 31

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent!!!

    I love this one! I like the title it has, and I can feel the rage with you excellent punctuation. Good write, and good luck!


    • Shelby K
      May 31
      Edit | Reply
      thank you so much. i am glad you liked my poem. i just wish i could vent out my anger on the ones who have been doing this to me.


      • loche
        May 31
        Edit | Reply
        I know how that is, lol. That's why I got into mixed martial arts. MMA It works

1 - 15 of 15