fields, broad horizons
cramped small nest, your only home
hesitant to soar
A contest entry
- BABY EAGLE HAIKU by Swan song.
700 points, ended June 19, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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very much so without even pin feathers nicely done
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I love the image.
This haiku brings back memories. I wrote an eagle haiku a couple of years ago when I was starting to write them. The neat thing about haiku is that we don't need to title them. A lot of poets use the first or second line to use as a title, just so they can keep track of them. I used to spend forever thinking of titles for my haiku, so I love it now that I only use the first line. I personally never use the third line, which is where I tend to put the AHA moment.
"hesitant to soar" makes an excellent first line, in my opinion. The AHA moment occurs most often in the third line, or at the beginning of the second line. Eaglets are hesitant at first to leap from their nests.
'baby eagle leaps' is an example of what could work really well for the third line. It's that moment of clarity where the reader sees that baby eagle chick just coming into his own after spending the past couple of months chasing around the other baby chicks in the comfort of their nest. It usually takes them a good two months to make that fateful leap. What I love to do when I write haiku from a prompt is look up some information on them first, and it helps me to get a good feel for writing something that fits. I did that with the baby eagle haiku I wrote earlier.
Don
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very good. For three lines this is very detailed. good luck in the contest :]
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