in expressive silence our love lies bleeding
from the unarmed truth of the liars needing
this truth comes bubbling to the surface
to break the mold of something worth less
picket fences
around black holes
care intensive
for the wounded souls
the demons of their own designs
building castles in their minds
fleeting glimpses of blinded souls
painting love upon judgement calls
now shock bleeds the red from your face
did you think we could lie to grace?
in expressive silence, we say it all
like shadow puppets on the wall
and still my love just lies here bleeding
we wound the truth, with the lie we're leading
did I really think I could lie to grace?
now shock bleeds the red from my face.
picket fences
around black holes
care intensive
for these wounded souls
in expressive silence my love lies bleeding
from the unarmed truth of a liars needing
this truth comes bubbling to the surface
to break the mold of something worth less
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Comments
1 - 27 of 27
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so this is just me re reading..cos i miss your poetry..very much..
I already left such a huge comment so im not gonna say much..just I was here..I read..it moved...but you know that right?
you are truly one of the finest poets here in poetry land
Shine my poet friend
T
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Wow, this write took me for a ride that is still in mid air. The structure of this is thought provoking. Amazing use of metaphores. These made me read this about five times. Each timeI read it again, I began to understand what you were appempting to say Good poetry is always open to interpritation, as is this one. Ten people may view it ten different ways. That is the beauty of poetry. You filter in all of your emotions, and do it so well. This was a learning tool for me as well. I enjoy reading other poets on a regular basis; to pick up alternate styles. Thank you for writing this. Very powerfull, indeed,
John
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i like this poem... it speaks to me in a way...
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Incredible and captivating! I actually love the repeatition in this poem, it really completes the picture. My favorite parts are
did you think we could lie to grace?
now shock bleeds the red from your face
this truth comes bubbling to the surface
to break the mold of something worthless
Those words are truly profound to me.
I love this poem, like so many others by you,
thanks for sharing
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this is wonderful
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genus.
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Wow, that's amazing. I love it =) you defs have a way with words
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Wow...definitely deserving of a mention in the spot light, you captured the pic with an emotion that brings out the dark side of the heart, sadness, shadows, a solitude of pain. Excellent. Blessings.
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With apologies in advance. I barely understand this poem. The inverted sentence structure needed to make the poem rhyme makes comprehension difficult. But beyond that some of these lines just don't make sense. "the unarmed truth of a liars needing" ??? sounds profound but what does it mean?
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i think thats what the point of poetry is
is it not?? i mean what it means to the reader or how they interpet
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beautiful.
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amazing
wow...just ..wow.
im speechless...
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Thought provoking write!!!
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thank you susan
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i think this is beautiful. the only thing is you spelled "their" wrong. but i love this poem, great job.
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thanks
i edited that
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this poem got me speechless.... it speaks alot of truths
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Excellent, and far from something worthless.
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Awsome~
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excellent
I really enjoyed reading this piece of wonderfully written work.... new to AP and looking forward to reading more great work... -
I really liked the picture at the top of this. I also really like the middle it was very well put together and read nicely. I felt like the rhymes in the first stanza were a bit forced however, other than that a great piece
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Hi Teddybear, I really likd this one, strong and descriptive. Like the way you start and finish with the same verse.
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You did a great job with this piece! It was strongly written, and the rhyme that you used is perfect. Great work!
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Wow! This is an absolutely phenomenal piece! One could pull so many scenarios from this perfection. So I pull my own yet I will keep it a secret. Tell me the roots of this gem
Kelly
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Well, I think it may possibly be the finest write I have read, of yours,I know I say it a lot, kid in a candy store effect, but this one is just magnificent, beauty seeps from it, in this one, you display the art of poetry, which is different to just poetry.
Im not doing the whole nice rhythm, love that verse stuff, cos this is beyond that.
The first verse, just took me by the hand, and took me on a journey . If i had not been intending to read it, i would have been captivated by it, and stayed any way.
some poets, do imagry that we can see, but you did this with emotions, you made me actually feel you,
I love the way your words blend together, like a chalk picture in the rain, everything just becoming one, each fragment bleeding into another, it is completely heart stoppingly beautiful, beyond beauty.
I love the repetition too, it is a really emotive beseeching quality, made me catch my breath a little.
I would choose a favourite line, but i cant not just because theyre all excellent, but because they exist in complete harmony, so to seperate would some how detract
if you want my opinon, I would run with it, cos it seems to have a heartbeat now, it would be a shame to stop it, and there seems to be so much of you in it
lol, well there ya have it, mighty fine write, from the master of the craft
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this is really outstanding, teddy...seriously...love the "picket fences..." stanza...i can feel this...the emotion and passion is thick...saddening and heavy...gray...love the images and color...i love what you do...i dont know what advise i could offer cause in my opinion, this is flawless...i will, however check out the two links...love love it...you are so good....so beautiful
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why thank you dear
um yeah idk its a big um ... message that just doesnt fit on a page i think .. and i just dont feel i can get it quite right but what a great comment
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