I lift my weary face to the setting sun,
the wind whispers a good night.
Calm seas ahead.
Into the endless horizon and away from my chaos.
The gulls and dolphins sing their songs,
harmony with my hope and happiness.
With eyes that have cried till raw and now dry with the first step aboard my blessed ship.
Like my soul and heart, the ship will not tire, but rest then move onward.
Author notes
Written March 14th, 2004
A contest entry
- Contest for new March members ~Come Sail Away~ by Barbara.
300 points, ended April 3, 2004, 49 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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i loved this poem, well done
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Please make the necessary adjustments to this poem so that it may fit the criteria.
It is a wonderful poem in its own right, desription is flawless and brings forth mind pictures of exceptional clarity.
~Von~ -
I do hope you add some more to this, or break up some of the lines to rearrange them to make 10 lines. It is a good piece but it just doesn't fit the contest rules. You still have plenty of time to edit so that it does, if you want to win.
I enjoyed reading, good luck!
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I agree if you just re-arrange a few words you'll have a great poem, well it is already beautiful but you know what I mean!
Lakota x -
i hope you take barbaras advice because i think you have a good chance of doing well with this...the imagery took me with you drifting peacefully along...you created an extremely tranquil setting...good luck in the contest!..hugs..leanne xx
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Beautiful. Perhaps you can 'add' to the lines to make the minimum and IM Barbara or one of t he Greeters!
Thank you so much for entering. A perfect caption to the painting.
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This is nicely written, but I'm afraid that it does not meet the contest criteria. One of the contest 'rules' was that enties had to be a minimum of ten lines...which you can easily meet by breaking a few of your lines up.
Nice imagery and feeling in this, and I like those last two lines a lot.
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