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Without the Light

I sit in my dark room
  and I try to think of
your face.
  In all this madness, I
forget my place.

In this madness, we've found
  one another; afraid, unsure
and alone.
  But the feelings to come were to us,
completely unknown.

As it goes, I've found myself
  buried down in your lies,
your hate.
  I should have run, turned away
before it was too late.

  I led myself into you, willingly,
blindly. I believed every word
that fled your lips..we lost ourselves
in our fingertips.
      You knew what to say to get
me to let you in. Every word, every
song, every move, so planned, so
careful. And I see it now, tearful.
  Now you only speak when it's convenient,
when it's easiest to get me high.
You bring me up with the sun and
down with the dusk.
  I trusted you, put my everything
into our future...what we could
  have had.
But you let me down, and I couldn't
  be more glad.

Now I don't have to care,
  I don't need to cry over
broken dreams.
  We're better off this way,
it seems.

Though pain is there and
  I feel a twinge of remorse,
this is right.
  I see you better without
the light.

I'm sorry that we didn't work
out, that I couldn't love you
like I thought I could. But
if given a better chance, I would.
In our short live, I'm sure
we'll meet again, but until
then...

Adieu, my love. You were
the world to a blind, hopeful
heart. Take joy in your
freedom and leave your
  part.

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Comments


  • temporarybeauty
    June 1

    Edit | Reply
    This is really good! You describe an interesting situation very elegantly, with a lot of abstractness but just enough solid ideas to keep the reader grounded. My favorite line is "I see you better without the light."...It's pretty amazing. The kind of sentiment I've tried so often to express, but I've never managed to do it quite as effectively as you do here. Overall I really enjoyed this, I'm a definite fan.


    • SilentMusic
      June 9
      Edit | Reply
      Your opinion means a lot to me! I'm grateful that you appreciate my work. I've found myself using metaphors and abstract thoughts to express myself more than normal words. I'd be more than willing to assist you, if you'd like. ;]
      Feel free to email me anytime.


  • Sweet-Sins
    May 29

    Edit | Reply
    awww that is sooo good- really nicely written
    my fav bit was
    I led myself into you, willingly,
    blindly. I believed every word
    that fled your lips..we lost ourselves
    in our fingertips.
    You knew what to say to get
    me to let you in. Every word, every
    song, every move, so planned, so
    careful. And I see it now, tearful.
    Now you only speak when it's convenient,
    when it's easiest to get me high.
    You bring me up with the sun and
    down with the dusk.
    I trusted you, put my everything
    into our future...what we could
    have had.
    But you let me down, and I couldn't
    be more glad.

    keep wriiting!
    xx

    • SilentMusic
      June 9
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you! That particular stanza was the most difficult to write, as it has the most meaning to me. I'm glad that you like it. ;]